Still scared, less anxiety-ridden.

amyh — Wed, 23 Apr 2008 23:48:00 GMT

First of all, as Amy G requested: college talk!

Well, more of it anyway.

I'm currently trying to decide between Hampshire College and Juniata College. I'm leaning more for Juniata right now, but sometimes I'll be leaning more for Hampshire. I simply can't make up my mind :/ And to complicate matters, I'll be visiting Transylvania University on Friday because they called me up yesterday and convinced me that I should come and sit in on a class, because I shouldn't rule out going to school in Lexington just because it's in Lexington! Plus, the woman I spoke with was so nice and understanding about the whole "GET OUT OF KENTUCKY" mindset, that I realized hey, I could at least give Transy a fair play (also considering they've given me the nicest financial aid package). Soo. Basically, college is annoying and confusing and yet I still don't even know where I'll be going next year. Rough!

Here's my total list of schools applied to and my status:

• Juniata (accepted)
• Wittenberg (accepted)
• Kenyon (wait-listed)
• University of Kentucky (accepted)
• Transy (accepted)
• Centre (accepted)
• NYU (wait-listed)
• Tufts (rejected)
• Hampshire (accepted)
• Sarah Lawrence (wait-listed)

I am pretty curious about the wait-listed schools, though. Will I get in?! Who knows!

And now, pictures from Memphis and Oxford! I promised these, and so I shall deliver :)

Obligatory foot picture. Saskia's foot on the right, mine on the left.

After eating dinner at Rendezvous, we went up to greet the Peabody ducks in their "penthouse" and get group pictures.

My teacher, Mr. Liimatta, climbing over the Mississippi River. COOLEST EVER.

After the big group picture, my little group of friends got our own picture taken :)

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Saskia is a good boy so far.

The next day, we went to hang out in Oxford. First we visited Rowan Oak, William Faulkner's home. SO GORGEOUS THERE, LET ME TELL YOU.

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When we boarded the bus again, Mr. Liimatta forced us all to smell the wisteria. Except Saskia, who was wearing it in her hair.

We chilled at Faulkner's grave. Mr. Liimatta read sections to us from The Sound And The Fury, and Michelle (my fellow Wand/Literature gal) preached to us the words of Rev. Shegog.

I chilled a little with Faulkner myself, and very much enjoyed the wonderful town of Oxford. Ohhh. It was a marvelous trip.

I'm headed off to prom this Saturday, which is going to be fun, I hope! I have a pretty dress and I'll be riding in a limo with a few of my friends and it's going to be so wonderful :)

I didn't even really care about prom until January, when some of my classmates were talking about it. I suddenly realized, "Hey. I want to be able to say I went to my senior prom."

On a final note, I'm registered to vote! And on May 20th, I'll be voting in my state's primary election. Oh, how exciting.

I am scared out of my mind.

amyh — Mon, 21 Apr 2008 01:31:00 GMT

So I just got back from a pretty interesting English trip. We went to Memphis and Oxford, Mississippi (hgfujdksdhsfajk the latter of which was AMAZING). My english teacher, Mr. Liimatta, is fantastic because he played Harry and the Potters for us. Honestly, he planned this amazing trip down to the littlest details — dedication, right? Oh man. Pictures soon, I promise. (I know I've promised pictures for multiple things lately, but I have so many from this trip, that I really can't keep them away.)

My group of friends and I, though, are kind of, um. Discombobulated. And I get the feeling some people are particularly pissed at me because I don't really voice a lot of my concerns/issues/etc., and I kind of avoided some people, or at least it seemed like I was avoiding some people (when really, I just wanted to sit outside and enjoy Oxford some more).

It's pretty scary, actually, that we still have all of this unresolved issues with each other, yet in little over a month it'll all be over. School, that is. High school. We'll be off doing summer activities and then boom! college. I don't even know yet where I'm going to college (Hampshire? Juniata? Somewhere I got waitlisted, like Kenyon or NYU? Of course, this depends on if I end up getting in anyway, I guess).

fhdsiujfksla. This still freaks me out so much. Saskia's going away to Kalamazoo next year, a bunch of my friends are staying in-state, I'll be going who-knows-where but I know it won't be near here. And I'm scared out of my mind at the idea of making new friends. I like my friends. I don't want new friends. Sometimes, I get this overwhelming urge to stay in Lexington just because of my friends — thought I've promised myself (and Saskia) that no decision should be based on this, at least not one as important as the next four years of my life. But honestly, the idea of not having these people, of not having Saskia and Vincent and Brian and Tati and Lauren and James — why do I want to be without the people who have pulled me through high school? I have no way of knowing if I'll make good friends in college, I have no way of knowing how long it'll take me to do so, and I have no way of knowing (and this is what kills me) if I'll keep in touch with my current friends throughout college. At least with high school, I've known that no matter which way I turn, I'll have somebody to lean on and hug and talk to and hang with. But after this summer, I don't know a thing. And I can't stand the thought of not having a glimpse into my future.

I should be working on mentoring because I need to e-mail my mentor. And I need to work on Lit Mag stuff with a friend of mine. And I need to do french. Oh dear. This week is going to be stressful.

amylicious! : oxford

Still scared, less anxiety-ridden.

I am scared out of my mind.