Your Smile On Fire

...from the song Xavia

post email panic

While I wasn’t really planning on writing a third post today, sometimes these things just happen. Plus, I am very obviously addicted to blogging.


Or, uh, you know, writing in general. (It occurs to me that I use words like “um” and “uh” far more often in my writing than I should. There’s even an instance of it in my essay. In a book! Probably qualifies me as A WEIRD WRITER, which is probably one of the highest forms of WEIRD you can reach. Yay me!)


Anyways, today I was thinking about something I refer to, at least in my own mind, as POST EMAIL PANIC.


Post email panic is what happens when, after happily sending an email off to someone, you become convinced that IT HAS BEEN SENT TO THE WRONG RECIPIENT AND WILL DESTROY YOUR WORLD WHEN IT INEVITABLY FALLS INTO THE WRONG HANDS. This happens one of two ways.


  1. You send the email and the very second you hit the send button you are suddenly stricken with panic that you sent it to the wrong person. After all, you know so many people whose names begin with M so how could you have possibly sent it to the right one? (Seriously you guys, are you on a mission to make sure at least half the names in my contact list begin with the letter M?) So then you frantically click to your ’sent’ box and make sure it has been directed to the proper email address. Then you check it three more times just to be sure. After all, you can never be too certain! (Especially when it comes to things that you, at that point in time, HAVE ABSOLUTELY NO CONTROL OVER.)
  2. The whole sending of the email goes fine. It’s not until a couple days (or weeks, depending) that the anxiety sets in. Because OHMYGOSH THAT WAS A TOP SECRET VERY IMPORTANT EMAIL AND THERE IS STILL NO RESPONSE and of course you’ve talked to the intended recipient since then so wouldn’t they have brought it up? Except that they did. Which is why you’re totally freaking out and, after checking to be sure you actually sent it to the right M-name, you go to plan B. Which involves typing out a short and awkward email around the lines of, “Oh, uh, just checking to see if you got that last email I sent you? About the thing with the thing? Yeah? Okay, great, just, yanno, wondering. No biggie.” And then you wait impatiently for the ALL CLEAR email which means YES I GOT IT OF COURSE I GOT IT, WHO DID YOU THINK IT WENT TO ANYWAYS?


Yanno: (v) A combination of “you” and “know”. Yanno, these dictionary entries are awesome.


In any case, Post Email Panic happens to me a little too often. And the thing is, whenever I really think of what would happen if one of those emails went to the wrong person, the answer is 99.8% of the time… nothing. Maybe some mild embarrassment? I remember, after writing my Red essay and promptly sending it to Michelle (of course), being panicked that I sent it to my mom instead. I was like, Nooo, she can’t read that!! (And now, of course, it goes without saying that she has read it. Der.)


Man. Life is hilarious.


Der: The funny person’s duh. See also, doi. You don’t get a lot of der these days.


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Oct. 15 [going to work soon] [two school essays due; majorly nervous about both] [remember when i wrote that short story where the girl said "majorly" every other WORD practically? ha]