gmail is a tricksy thing : red

Gmail got nothing on this.

saskiab — Sun, 06 Apr 2008 19:05:00 GMT

Observation: It's really quite weird when people you know from entirely different situations end up friends. Por ejemplo: Last night, I found out that one of my good friends from elementary/middle school (small, Montessori) and a friend of mine from a Mother-Daughter Book Club that happened from about second grade to -- not quite sure when, but there was a 'reunion' meeting a year and a half ago -- are apparently great friends and have spent the past week together visiting Philadelphia and New York with one or two others. This cross-applies to a lot of situations: I don't know why, but I am continuously shocked when people I knew back in Montessori meet, and befriend, people I know in my current, public high school. Or when people I knew from my elementary school but who didn't go to my middle school meet people from my middle school who didn't go to my elementary school. Or any combination thereof, including people that I know from last summer's Governor's Scholars Program, people from Camp Everytown the year before that, and people I know randomly through Teen Board or Teen Court or other such places. Yeah.

Observation: College is a really hard decision.

Backstory: For years, I was crazy easygoing -- I'd stress out about a few things, but, by and large, I wasn't too concerned with much of anything. And then college came up, and suddenly grades and activities and past experiences mattered more than they'd ever done before. That, in itself, was a bit nerve-wracking, even though I'm lucky in that I'm a good test-taker and that, in the long run, I don't have that many problems with school. You know, overlooking most of my entire junior year. I've been relatively involved in various activities, I've been published... all of these made things easier.

First, I was worried that I wouldn't get in anywhere. I mostly joked about this: the administrator of my program (also probably a benefit in the college searching process -- I'm in an accelerated/college-prep sort of program in my high school) and I would have discussions in which we would go over 'what-ifs' -- it was basically decided that I would work at a local bakery from about 4:00 AM to 2:00 PM during the day and spend the rest of my waking hours writing and becoming famous without the aid of a college education -- though she made it quite clear that she fully expected me to get into lots of, and lots of good colleges. I knew, logically, that I shouldn't worry, but then again... who doesn't? National Merit and publication statuses nonwithstanding, something could Happen, right, and there was always a chance that I'd run into problems. There were several specific incidences where I talked to (in person, via phone, or via Instant Messenger) people and the conversation -- if it can be called that -- was basically me going on and on about 'what if I don't get in, what if I don't make friends, what if things don't work out the way I want them to'

And then I got my first acceptances -- Centre and Wittenberg -- and even though they were more fallback schools, 'Just-In-Case' applications, it was still nice to know that some college, somewhere, wanted me to go there.

I cried when I got into Beloit, which, at the time, was my top choice. When I was sending out my applications, even, I had a moment of panic where I told my friend Brian, "Oh my God, I think I'm going to apply Early Decision to Beloit, I feel so strongly that I want to go to this school. It sounds amazing, but I'm terrified that I'm even contemplating this." (I found out about ten minutes later that Beloit doesn't do Early Decision -- which made me relax kind of a lot). I was quiet about my acceptance: I was in my computer science class, and Mom had emailed me about my acceptance. I wanted to shout out the news, but kept it in, instead emailing several friends ("OH MY GOD AMY HUNT I GOT INTO BELOIT. i'm like, crying", "oh my god OH MY GOD I got into my top college", "I got into Beloit which just about negates my need for a lobotomy" and other such missives)

When I got into Kalamazoo, I froze. It was computer science again, and Mom emailed me: "Don't scream, but Kalamazoo wants you". I forwarded that to a friend of mine who goes there, adding the line "I thought that this might interest you," you know, coming off as a lot more calm than I felt. You know how in books people describe a "cool rain" sort of feeling when something happens? Where they get all very calm and controlled? That was basically my reaction to K. My friend J got back to me immediately, freaking out ("in a good way") about the news, which sort of broke through my stony exterior and I might have spun around in my chair several times (attracting a few curious looks). Kalamazoo was, at the time, in my top three choices and, at the time, I thought, "Beloit made me cry. Kalamazoo made me calm. This probably means I'm going to Beloit." When I got home, I read my acceptance letter very carefully and just reflected on the whole thing.

I found out about Bryn Mawr (and Mount Holyoke) at home, via their websites. For both of those, I might've danced a little bit, run downstairs to inform mom, et cetera. With both of these, my sister told me she was 'disappointed that [I was] even considering a school without boys' and I sort of just laughed her off, being jubilant and all.

With the other schools, I was either pleased or frank (I was pretty excited about getting into Grinnell, because that was, I felt, my reach school, but I didn't react as strongly as I did to Bryn Mawr or Beloit) or both, but yes.

The problem with getting into so many (and so many good schools) is the decision-making. By about February, I knew that Beloit, Kalamazoo, and Bryn Mawr were my top three, but throughout the getting-in process, my top one changed quite frequently. For a while, I wanted nothing more than to go to Bryn Mawr, partially so that I could say I'd been to Bryn Mawr. This whole time, I was essentially convinced that I'd go to Beloit or Kalamazoo in the long run, and entertained the other possibilities as just a, "it would be cool if I went there but I probably won't end up doing so" sort of situation. I talked to people about the benefits of the other schools, about why I'd love to go to them... but I don't think I ever really expected that I would. At some point in March, I became marginally disenchanted with Beloit and told myself (and Amy) that I was going to Kalamazoo but not to tell anyone else -- probably a good thing, because a week later I started reading up on Beloit again (mostly in their coursebook) and getting really, really excited about all the possibilities (it didn't hurt that I'd discovered that a member of the future Beloit class of 2012 was a great fan of RED). A week before spring break (that is, two Saturdays ago), I was just about to declare to Amy that I was actually probably going to Beloit... but I hesitated. Told myself not to think about college for a week (hah. As if). Told myself not to make any decisions until I'd visited the schools (I went on a college-visiting trip last week; Wednesday to Saturday, visiting Beloit and Kalamazoo). Tried not to dwell (which proved to be very hard).

But it's a good thing that I didn't declare. I went to Beloit expecting to be amazed, expecting to fall in love with it, expecting my future there to be cemented. But something felt a bit off -- it was a nice enough college, but, unfortunately, in my own, personal, opinion, it represented itself on paper a lot more adeptly than it did in actual presentation. The size was perfect. One of the three classes that I sat in on (an education class) was amazing. There were interesting people. But (as I wrote in my notebook of observations as I settled down, watching Heathers with my night host and her roommate that night), the thing with Beloit was, I couldn't really see myself there for the next four years. There was something about the campus: I just couldn't picture myself as a student there.

I visited Kalamazoo the next day. My seeing the campus was like my seeing the Wittenberg campus over spring break of last year: I didn't want to love it, but I did. K and Wittenberg are the two colleges I've loved upon sight (when I did my visits last year, I kept telling myself that I only liked Wittenberg because it was the first college I visited, but, really, the feeling I got at that campus wasn't nearly met by any of the other colleges that year. My only issue with Wittenberg was, actually, the academics: they bored me. Which, you know, kind of a problem in an educational institution?). It felt sort of like home -- not in the sense that I belonged there (though I did get an inkling of that), but in the sense that it reminded me a lot of Lexington. Dad and I stopped for Starbucks on our way to locating his hotel, and I remember looking out the window and thinking, this reminds me almost exactly of the street leading to my high school. Just like Kentucky! Except without so many horses. I realized that, even though I don't want to stay in Kentucky, I want to stay somewhere a lot like it. I love how Kentucky is. It's a jewel, really -- even though it's poor as anything, even though it's the brunt of many hick/redneck jokes... the land, itself, is beautiful. My grandmother once called it a 'secret beauty', which I feel is very true. People don't really get to experience it that much, for which I'm actually pretty glad. I want Kentucky to stay a secret paradise. I want to live elsewhere for at least four years, yes, but that doesn't mean I love it any less. Perhaps it means that I love it all the more -- absence makes the heart grow fonder, after all -- but I don't know. The area of Michigan where Kalamazoo is... well. It might not be as green in early April as the (rather flooded) Kentucky is, but the feel of the area is the same. The people at the college were more engaging. The campus reminded me of the lovechild of Wittenberg and Morehead, except with better academics (and, considering I loved the Wittenberg campus and lived on the Morehead one for five weeks (subsequently growing to adore the location(and even the thirteen flights of steps to my room!), too), this is a really good thing) and a bit more beautification. It rained there the night I stayed, which I think actually charmed me. The people there seemed more helpful, more active. I don't know. Maybe my friend J secretly contacted everyone there and told them to be engaging (I don't think she did. I hope she didn't...) around me. More personable, like.

Except, when I left the Kalamazoo campus to go back to Chicago (for the flight), I kept second-guessing my feelings. "You've been enamored with Beloit for so long," I said to myself. "Maybe it's just that you visited K after actually getting sleep the night before." By the time I got home, even though I'd been convinced while on the Kalamazoo campus that I would be attending Kalamazoo next fall, I'd all but talked myself out of this decision. I actually considered going to Centre, instead (closest campus to me, and yet I've never visited it. Go figure!) for about half an hour.

And then I hung out with Amy at a local coffeeshop. When we were driving to her house after, I fell into another one of those collegiate panics and we discussed how difficult, how final it is to declare one particular college as The One. We talked through our thought processes, panicked a bit together, but even as we were doing that, I began to realize that no matter how much I might flipflop on college, the chance of my sending in my initial deposit to anywhere but Kalamazoo was incredibly slim. I was loathe to admit this to anyone, especially myself, but somehow I did let her (and J) know, and before I left Amy's house last night, I had already introduced myself to the Kalamazoo class of 2012 on Facebook. This act, in itself, made me panic a bit more, but when I got home, I told my mom that I was probably going to go to K next year and, for the first time in months, my college-related panic lessened.

When I started this post, I was panicking again. "Is this the right choice?" I asked myself. "Can I really be so certain?"

But the thing is, no matter how much I might want a perfect school, there isn't one. Kalamazoo is the best fit I've found, even if the final decision was basically based off of the aura of the campus. The difference, as I told Amy, between K and Beloit, was that I could see myself as a student at Kalamazoo. Moreso than at any other college I've visited, I've felt that I could really succeed there. I still am not 100% certain that I'm right, but, then again, I think I'll probably be panicking, however minutely, about this decision for probably the rest of my life. "Did I make the right choice?" I'll probably ask myself in twenty years. "If I'd gone to [insert other school here], where would I be in life?" Even though there probably isn't a perfect place for me, I don't think that I'm settling. I'm aspiring, and I fully intend on being great. And although I keep having these ridiculous panicked moments, part of me is extremely calm. I'm terrified, yes, but also (in the immortal words of Carla Perez-Gallardo), I am EXCITED.

Also, though I'm glad to be finally out of braces... I really hate my retainer. :)

gmail adverts are offering me free love cards!!

saskiab — Sat, 02 Feb 2008 07:24:00 GMT

SO it has been forever. About, oh, a few weeks ago, I had this huge long post written out, but this site crapped out for, like, three days, and said post (which was largely about girls' schools in Bristol, as in England, and my tumblog, and such things. There were a zillion links, so this is highly upsetting.

Why am I awake so late? You might ask that, and I might ask the same. :| it's because I've started writing short stories again, and there's this one that's about, oh. Two sentences long so far, and I really want to write more, but my muse has been SLAIN by the horrors that are germs. So I'm wasting time before I go to bed (presumably in the next five minutes or so).

In the past week I have:

Turned eighteen (on Wednesday! Hurrah!)
Registered to vote (so excited!!)
Gotten quite ill and had to stay at home for essentially two (one and two thirds?) days. Which basically sucks.

...yeah, I don't really have that much to say. I'm feeling rather ill, still, because my sister kind of accidentally broke a lot of nail polish bottles and the smell is getting to me. I also feel dirty, because of my illness and the way it compromises my hygine, and tired, because it's, well. Pretty darn late. And headachey and sniffley and stuff, but I am NO LONGER HUNGRY because I made food with my magnificent Quesadilla Maker Of Doom (or, as my friend J likes to call it, my armadillo maker). Hurrah, food!

Tomorrow (today. UGH) is my party. Pizza and Wakko's Wish for the win!

To do:

Rent Wakko's Wish
SLEEP
Get at table at the restaurant
SLEEP
Send J's package (which I've been promising for, like, two months now? Three? Definitely since the RED party, because. One of the things is an autographed copy of RED! A lot of you might remember signing it, or one of the other three. Um.)
SLEEP
Get healthy. Bonus points for not infecting friends!
Write more
Do math homework
SLEEP
Listen to more Bare: a Pop Opera, which is a pretty great musical with pretty great music. (Thanks, Megan, for unknowningly introducing me!)
SLEEP

As you can probably tell, sleep is a little bit important to me. MOM, IF YOU READ THIS BLOG BEFORE WAKING ME UP, LET ME SLEEP IN TILL NOONISH? THANKS.

And now, to sleep. Carry on, folks! Have a brilliant first-weekend-of-February.

SLEEP.

gmail is trying to sell me farting e-cards!!

saskiab — Wed, 19 Dec 2007 00:12:00 GMT

Right, so I know that it's kind of late in the game for this (and Hanukkah's already over, &c), but Jordyn's mix CD post made me wonder: would anyone potentially be interested in a winter holiday card exchange, or anything?

gmail advert says, "ann coulter's column free", and I say, =; not interested kthx

saskiab — Thu, 13 Dec 2007 20:55:00 GMT

Hello, it's been forever :-"

NEVER LET IT BE SAID THAT FAMILY DOES NOT ROCK.

So you guys know how RED is in Newsweek, and how our sales have gone from ~4000 to ~1300 ish since then, right? WELL. My uncle, who works for the Washington Post, totally just suggested RED for the Washington Post Book Review! And the Deputy Editor of the Washington Post Book World said she'd take a look at it.

This is kind of thrilling, guys. KIND OF REALLY THRILLING. Even if it doesn't pan out, it's thrilling

In other news:

So in my English class, we read these Big Huge Novels and plays that are Literally (in the sense of literature) Important, and then we do Big Huge Group Projects on them. Projects consist of the ever-important theme statement, a graphic organizer (mostly for the class to take notes on), lots of nuggets (1-10 word excerpts from the book/play that exemplify an aspect of the book or play), class discussion, a song that aptly portrays themes in the book/play, theme statement, and novel... and a Critical Article Outline from each group member.

Critical Articles are essentially scholarly articles that you find and basically outline and turn in (okay, that's a sucky description, but whatever).

Our most recent Big Huge Novel was Ralph Ellison's Invisible Man, and my Big Huge Group Project was on the characters in the second half of the novel (~chapter 13 onward, or, from when he meets the Brotherhood till the end). The article I found was "Invisible Desires: Homoerotic Racism and Its Homophobic Critique in Ralph Ellison’s Invisible Man” by Daniel Kim, and, um. It frankly got kind of worse each time I read it -- the article basically said (direct quote) "by imposing a racist hierarchy, these white men seek to use black men much as men are inclined to use women: as objects to satisfy a whole spectrum of repressed erotic desires", and really stressed Park's Introduction to the Science Of Sociology and the declaration that the "innate 'racial temperament' of the 'Negro' is ... the lady among the races" and that sort of stuff :| I felt like less of a person after reading it so closely. It was absurdly hilarious... to a point, and then it just got to be all, "OKAY, MR. KIM, NORTON DOESN'T NECESSARILY LUST AFTER HIS DEAD DAUGHTER AND THE FACT THAT HIS MOST "PASSIONATE", "IMPORTANT", "SACRED" REASON FOR PHILANTHROPY IN REGARDS TO THE COLLAGE IS TO "CONSTRUCT A LIVING MEMORIAL TO [HIS] DAUGHTER," AND THE WAY HE VIEWS THE STUDENTS OF SAID COLLEGE AS A "MONUMENT TO HER MEMORY" DOES NOT NECESSARILY MEAN THAT THESE SUPPOSED LATENT INCESTUOUS FEELINGS TOWARD HER CONVEY HIS EROTIC DESIRES UNTO THE STUDENTS."

Um. Yeah. Okay. Now that that is off my shoulders...

I didn't get to bed until like three am, though, what with the outlining of the article :| and coming up with a final theme statement (ultimately 'society sleepwalks, stumbling through the dark for salvation; the nightmare ends only when dreamers awaken to the shadowed sun') for the project or anything. I think I've lost my ability to read today because of this. :| I certainly know I didn't have my ability to function as a normal human being when I woke up this morning:

(bear in mind that my usual IM conversations, though not necessarily replete with capital letters (except in the case of CAPSLOCK!abuse), do maintain appropriate SPaG - INCLUDING APOSTROPHES. ESPECIALLY APOSTROPHES -, and that this was just after I woke up and I turned all lights off and the screen's brightness and contrast as low as it could go and still be seen)

me: its like before seven freaking am

  :|

  god.

  why does school start before NOON

6:50 AM idcare about sports teams and their needign to rpactice earlier on or whateber the harebraned resoning behind thsi is

  ugh i can see how misspelled thatis

  its horriblw :|

  but im too lazy to fiz it :|

  foxc

  fix.

  thats the one.

  :|

6:51 AM J: i have no idea what you're talking about

me: how crazy it is that school starts before noon

  and how whatever the reson for that is probably rly stupid

6:52 AM and how i can see myself misspelling bc this computer has firefox and being a bit too lazy and tird to bother going back and fixing things

You guys, I am so embarrassed by this -- both my misspellings and LACK OF APOSTROPHES and punctuation and stuff, and also my babbling about how insane it is that school starts before noon (what really gets me, though, is the part where I say 'im, off :|'. HELLO. MISSING APOSTROPHE AND TOTALLY UNNECESSARY COMMA. I am not a morning person. This is my excuse). Of course it has to start before noon! How else would they make money off of lunch? :|

I leave you to consider this.

gmail advert says, "Fresh Baked Cookies, Custom Imprinted with your corporate Logo."

saskiab — Thu, 22 Nov 2007 18:58:00 GMT

Some additional thoughts:

+ I am having a Queen sort of day. Do you ever have days like this? Like, you have to listen to one band/song/sort of music or else?

+ SO FELLOW RED AUTHORS. WE ALL HAVE OUR REDMAILS. Since it's an extension of gmail, we also have GTalk (except. it's like. REDtalk, technically ;) :D). So who's for CONVERSATING VIA THIS? The emails are pretty easy to figure out, of course, so, like, totally we should add each other and like. Talk.

Hah I don't even know what exactly I'm going on about! But. You know?

gmail advert says, "SASKIA IS FEELING RATHER PROLIFIC LATELY" (no, really)

saskiab — Tue, 20 Nov 2007 02:24:00 GMT

I read somewhere once that there are two huge milestones in the average teenager's life: sex and driving. I have pretty much no experience with the former, but as for the latter...

Today I took the Graduated Licensing thing that my state requires. It took four hours for me to learn that drinking and driving is a bad thing, apparently. Mostly my thoughts wandered off after hearing about Blood Alcohol Contents for half an hour, mostly to random other trivial things.

HOWEVER. I did learn things! On my way back home, I learned to stop for a fireSUV (it was NOT a fireTRUCK, how odd) and a police car (INCOGNITO police car, I might add. I didn't notice it had those lights until they started flashing), and I learned to not drink and drive.

Not that I would.

ANYHOW. The guy who taught the class was my old AP Spanish teacher, so I pimped RED out to him (gave him a business card, y0) and went home, fully content that I won't lose my license in four weeks due to not taking this class.

On my driveway, I recognized that I back up like a drunk person, though, weaving all over all sides of the driveway. I DID manage to pull into the garage, with both my dad's van in the driveway and my mom's car in the garage, which I've never done before, though. And this was after a week and a half of not driving (the truck was in the shop right before I went to New York) (I drive a truck. Chevrolet, if you were wondering) (this is very important to me as a person).

gmail advert DOESN'T say: "SERIOUSLY DON'T READ THIS IT'S LIKE FOUR DAYS WORTH OF REALLY LONG EMAILS."

saskiab — Mon, 19 Nov 2007 20:34:00 GMT

The following post was taken from a number of emails I sent out to various friends and family members:

Hello, all! I'm currently sitting in an office apartment in Alphabet City in the lower east side (well, not technically, but CLOSE ENOUGH, OKAY?) of NYC. It's pretty exciting, even though it's kind of drizzling constantly here right now.

So last night, I drove out to Louisville with my friend, Amy Hunt, who is also being published in RED, to stay in a hotel so we wouldn't have to leave Lexington at like one am to make our flight. We first got Subway (my sandwich had too much mustard, woe), then sped over to the hotel in order to watch Gossip Girl (very important). Unfortunately, my plans to meet up with GSP peeps from the 'ville fell through, but it was all good, as we left later than expected &c and wouldn't have had time for me to chillax AND see Gossip Girl (my priorities are so skewed, woe).

Anyhow. Gossip Girl was amazing -- BLAIR AND CHUCK. HOW FANTASTIC. sorry for potentially spoiling anyone, ps -- and afterwards Amy and I checked our emails and she showered (I had done so before we left), and we got ready for bed. EASIER SAID THAN DONE, I MIGHT ADD. I HAD A DISTRESSING AND TOTALLY UNPROVOKED/UNFORESEEN ATTACK OF DANDRUFF (so upsetting), so I spent awhile trying to tell myself that it was all in my head. Um.

So after hair was dealt with and pajamas were put on, I convinced myself that leaving out the situp part of my nighttime exercise (hah. it's lame. it hardly even counts as exercise, really) regime was NOT something I could get up (I dislike situps :|). And then I couldn't fall asleep -- too excited! -- so I jumped around a lot in the dark. Amy joined me. We eventually collapsed on our beds, and I read RED while she read Ralph Ellison's Invisible Man until we fell asleep.

We woke up (~*I*~ woke up; Amy woke up earlier, what the heck) at 3:15, got dressed, watched an episode of Good Eats about cobbler (so yummy-looking!), finished packing, and left just when a hush puppy expose was supposed to start up on the FN. Woe that we missed that (to my family: we HAVE to watch the Iron Chef dessert special when it airs, okay?), but. It was time for our flight!

We got to the airport around four am. SO EARLY. WOE. and checked in (there was this cute guy who checked in after us, but he was being lame and going to Chicago instead of NYC. He was totally funny and we discussed the carry-on rules before going through security), then went through a really short security line (Apparently not many people are awake at 4 AM? The TSA were kind of lax about it all, too, which was surprising, but, then again, 4 AM. People who want to blow up planes are totally asleep then, like any sane person wou-- well. I guess they're actually ~*not*~ sane if they want to blow up/hijack planes? IDEK. whatever) and camped out at our exit until our plane was ready for boarding, at around 5:50 AM. Amy got a cheese danish and a hot chocolate from Starbucks -- I had most of her hot chocolate, hah -- and I observed how much I really like those rotating plastic protective things on airport toilets. So like. non-germy.

We got on the plane, and I fell asleep after about twelve minutes or so. IT WAS SO DARK WHEN I FELL ASLEEP, AND WHEN I WOKE UP I MOSTLY
KEPT MY EYES CLOSED, BUT I OPENED THEM AT SOME POINT AND WAS STARTLED BY THE LIGHT. and then I fell asleep again. We ended being 45 minutes late landing, because it had to circle lots.

After we picked up the one bag we checked (the stuff with our liquid items and my Liam (Liam is my special green blanket)), we headed waaaaaay downtown to Amy Goldwasser (the editor's) apartment. Which is four flights up, but because the flights in this building are skewed, it was more like nine flights. I was reminded of GSP (OH ALSO ABOUT GSP. ON THE RIDE HERE I HEARD ON THE RADIO ABOUT IDB BANK. GSP PEEPS WHO ARE GETTING THIS, I THOUGHT YOU MIGHT APPRECIATE THIS KNOWLEDGE).

We're staying in Amy G's office, which is next door to the apartment she lives in. It's beautiful and tiny (compared to what I'm used to), with lots of stairs and kind of reminiscent of my friend Lauren's house (only, you know, it's an apartment). After dumping our junk, we met Amy G's cats and got water, before heading out for some most delicious bagels with most fantastic cream cheese from a wonderful Jewish deli/bakery/thing (there was lots of fish and chocolate and bagels, but not much else, so I don't know what you would classify it as?). We brought them back to eat, and Amy G went over the website for RED (redthebook.com; it's going up OFFICIALLY in less than an hour!) while Amy H and I called Henry Clay (:|) and got through to Ms Gill's room, where James and Vincent and Brian and Lauren and Tati were all at lunch. So we talked to them on speakerphone for awhile, and amused Amy G by doing so. Oh, yes.

Right now we're mostly avoiding the rain, and I am (clearly) sending this email as Amy G finishes up a few things that need doing next door and Amy H phone-posts to LiveJournal and browses the music selections. We're leaving in about three hours for the party (so early!) to help set up -- it's in the Jing Fong dim sum hall, which is apparently a full city block big (!), even though the RED party is just getting a third of it. We have about 400 people scheduled to attend (!!!) -- Amy H and I are both reading our essays there (!!) -- but the hall holds up to 14 hundred. (AT THE PARTY there is going to be lots of dim sum and also red lip-shaped cookies and red punch. SO EXCITING. I'm still not 100% positive what I'm going to wear, but I'm thinking a firm black&white motif with like. Red lipstick and nail polish? Yeah.)

RED: the CD looks amazing, and the RED pens are pretty radtastic, and Amy and I are chillaxing before going to the party (I'm so stoked about meeting everyone -- Sarah S and Hayley H in particular, because I feel as if I've gotten to know them somewhat through vlogs and blogs -- we have plans to go to the Museum of Natural History with Sarah tomorrow, and we DID have plans for Spring Awakening with Hayley on Saturday, but our tickets were refunded, so we're probably just going to hang out that night instead -- but I digress)

Right now, I have to decide between the New York Documentary and some James Dean movie. fjdhg my vote is with James Dean -- I am a fan of this man -- but the NYD is pretty amazing, too.

Amy's waxing on about Amy's music selection, and I'm starting to cough again, so I'm going to wrap this up. I'm so stoked to be here, even with all the rain, and I'm ONLY THREE BLOCKS AWAY from the bakery that I decided was my favorite when I came here with my middle school ages ago (best raspberry lintzer tarts EVER), so that's cool.

AAAH. THREE HOURS.

Hope you all are having fantastic days (especially those of you in school, HAH. nyeah nyeah. ;-) ), and that you all read RED! ;-) I think I'm going to take a quick nap now, and then. IDEK. Do something else before the party (like, oh, get ready).

dkfhg I wish that I could use italics now. woe woe woe.

much love,

After I sent out that last email, I took an hour, hour and a half -ish nap. While I did so, Amy H went to take the goody bags for the party (they contained RED: the CD, a temporary tattoo from the fashion line that's associated with the books, business cards, and RED: the pen) with Peter -- Amy G's husband. When they got back, we all got dressed. I wore a black and white striped skirt -- sort of dizzying to look at -- and a black top with black shoes, silver-and-red earrings, and red lipstick&nail polish. Amy H wore a lovely polka-dotted dress with maroon-red shoes, Amy G wore a SEQUINED DRESS, black, with bright red heels, and Peter wore a gray suit.

We got to the party around 3:45 -- it started at 6 -- to finish setting up. Claudia B, a fellow author, was somehow already there, so she and Amy H and I hit it off. She had come straight from school and was stoked and nervous, just like us. Some other people came rather soon, including Olive and her band (We are Thor, which is actually a reference to a spelling error) and Hayley H, who is the awesomest youtuber ever. Hayley and I hit it off, too, especially after I suggested we put the tattoos on as Dark Marks. We had to find the bathroom together, because on the taxi ride over, I was holding the flowers, and they splashed a bit, and Hayley had to actually ~*go*~. (the bathrooms were disgusting, FTR)

When we got back from that, Sarah S (who I have been in contact with before today; we're LiveJournal friends) was there. It was her 15th birthday on Monday, so Amy H and I brought her chocolate and happy-birthday hugs. She was kind of radtastic. It was pretty amazing.

The twins were pretty cool, too, and I hit it off really well with Sarah-from-Massachusetts, who wrote about homophobic football players. We talked college (She's also applying to some of the same schools I am, though she ED'd another one before she left for NYC) and stuff. Claudia and I, at some point, scavenged for food (it was, as I mentioned, in a huge dim sum restaurant, so there were many dumplings &c available. There were also these AMAZING COOKIES.) \u003cbr\>I had a lot of books going around to get signed, but I by no means managed to approach every RED author there. I did get a good number, though.\u003cbr\>\u003cbr\>Oh, there was this group of private school NYC girls who were published, and when they met Amy H and me, they were all, I've never met anyone from Kentucky before, in kind of a scornful tone. But overall the entire experience was WAY COOL, including/especially reading my bit of essay. Not all of the 400 invited showed, possibly due to rain, but it was still pretty crowded! We Are Thor was a great band -- they covered Cruel To Be Kind, which kind of makes me love them, though, so maybe I'm biased? OH WELL.\n\u003cbr\>\u003cbr\>After the party, Amy H and I were the last to leave (but not before setting up plans for tomorrow with Sarah S!), because Amy G was the last to leave, and we're staying with her. She was really hungry, so we went to this Chinese restaurant that was literally called Yummy Noodles for a late, official dinner with her and Peter and two of her friends (one of them was one of the Pepper & Pistol fashion designers, and she was wearing an AMAZING shirt she made. It's the 'official' RED shirt, and it's one of a kind.). Amy H and I split beef pan fried noodles, because we weren't all THAT hungry.\n\u003cbr\>\u003cbr\>After that, we taxied home, got ready for bed, and discovered the wireless wasn't working (thus this email being sent out... not Thursday night). I am so exhausted I can hardly stand up -- I did do my exercises, though I cheated on the situps a little bit -- possibly also due in part to all the stairs around here!\n\u003cbr\> \u003cbr\>Tomorrow (today) we're going to meet up with Sarah S and her mother for the Museum of Natural History, lots of food, the Apple store on 5th Avenue, and random madness. After dinner, we'll be heading to the bookstore where the reading (the fourth reading, technically) will be taking place, because Sarah is reading there. I can hardly wait! But I better get to sleep.\n\u003cbr\>\u003cbr\>Much love, and hope everything is going great Kentucky (and elsewhere)-side,",1] ); //-->

I had a lot of books going around to get signed (like, too many), but I by no means managed to approach every RED author there. I did get a good number, though.

Overall the entire experience was WAY COOL, including/especially reading my bit of essay. Not all of the 400 invited showed, possibly due to rain, but it was still pretty crowded! We Are Thor was a great band -- they covered Cruel To Be Kind, which kind of makes me love them, though, so maybe I'm biased? OH WELL.

After the party, Amy H and I were the last to leave (but not before setting up plans for tomorrow with Sarah S!), because Amy G was the last to leave, and we're staying with her. She was really hungry, so we went to this Chinese restaurant that was literally called Yummy Noodles for a late, official dinner with her and Peter and two of her friends (one of them was one of the Pepper & Pistol fashion designers, and she was wearing an AMAZING shirt she made. It's the 'official' RED shirt, and it's one of a kind.). Amy H and I split beef pan fried noodles, because we weren't all THAT hungry.

After that, we taxied home, got ready for bed, and discovered the wireless wasn't working (thus this email being sent out... not Thursday night). I am so exhausted I can hardly stand up -- I did do my exercises, though I cheated on the situps a little bit -- possibly also due in part to all the stairs around here!

Tomorrow (today) we're going to meet up with Sarah S and her mother for the Museum of Natural History, lots of food, the Apple store on 5th Avenue (maybe), and random madness. After dinner, we'll be heading to the bookstore where the reading (the fourth reading, technically) will be taking place, because Sarah is reading there. I can hardly wait! But I better get to sleep.

Much love, and hope everything is going great Kentucky (and elsewhere)-side, \u003cbr\>Saskia\u003cbr\>\u003cbr\>PS; DID I MENTION THAT WE HAVE A ROOFTOP PATIO/BALCONY THINGUMYMY HERE??\u003cbr clear\u003d\"all\"\>",1] ); D(["mb","\u003cspan class\u003dsg\>\u003cbr\>-- \u003cbr\>~I like my meaningful statements to be properly grounded in fact~\n\u003cbr\>\u003cbr\>\u003ca href\u003d\"mailto:saskiab@redthebook.com\" target\u003d\"_blank\" onclick\u003d\"return top.js.OpenExtLink(window,event,this)\"\>saskiab@redthebook.com\u003c/a\>\u003cbr\>\u003cbr\>\u003ca href\u003d\"http://redthebook.com/cs/members/saskiab.aspx\" target\u003d\"_blank\" onclick\u003d\"return top.js.OpenExtLink(window,event,this)\"\>http://redthebook.com/cs\u003cWBR\>/members/saskiab.aspx\u003c/a\>\u003cbr\>\u003cbr\>Red: the Next Generation of American Writers -- Teenage Girls -- on What Fires Up Their Lives Today. (Available for order on \n\u003ca href\u003d\"http://amazon.com\" target\u003d\"_blank\" onclick\u003d\"return top.js.OpenExtLink(window,event,this)\"\>amazon.com\u003c/a\>. Search: Amy Goldwasser, or see your local bookstore!)\n\u003c/span\>",0] ); D(["ce"]); //-->

PS; DID I MENTION THAT WE HAVE A ROOFTOP PATIO/BALCONY THINGUMYMY HERE??

SO. Today was essentially amazing.

Amy H and I slept in (and by 'slept in' I mean as much as one can DO in New York, which means we woke up -- ~*I*~ woke up -- around 9:30 AM). We had breakfast -- rice krispies and cookies -- and I sent off last night's email and hung around, getting ready for the day, before setting up our thing with Sarah S: meeting at the Museum of Natural History.

We were late, of course -- I held us up with leaving putting real clothes on to the last minute -- but Sarah and her mom ended up getting to the MoNH just a few minutes before we did, so all was good.

THE MUSEUM WAS AMAZING. The three of us got in free, thanks to Amy's parent's membership, and we started at the very top and worked our way down. We managed to see ALMOST everything, however briefly, in about four and a half hours, too. Because I cheated on my situps last night, and didn't make them up this morning, I ended up doing five situps (so not very many, but whatever) in one of the sections with Indians. :| oh me. We also got a lot of shots of me being extremely irreverent and picking the noses (pretending to) of various huge statues and blue whales and things. We did the whole Big Bang walk, and we made a lot of dorky comments about the dinosaurs and early mammals, and all sorts of good stuff (SOME OF THOSE SKELETONS WERE REALLY QUITE TERRIFYING. THERE WAS THIS THING THAT LOOKED RATHER LIKE A TINY DEVILISH REINDEER AND IT TOTALLY FREAKED ME OUT :| :| :| (reindeer terrify me a little)). We had an (overpriced) meal in the museum cafeteria (I was a total pig and got pizza AND fries AND chicken dino!nuggets AND vitamin water AND two kinds of candy, because no one was there to tell me to get just what I could eat, and make sure it was healthy -- ;) hi mom! -- but I haven't eaten the candy yet, and I didn't eat all the food. :|). After that, Sarah S and I had traumatic bathroom experiences (they were FILTHY with BROKEN DOORS) and the three of us traveled a good deal of the first floor before tiring out around the minerals.

After the MoNH, we went to Central Park, intent on finding Strawberry Fields. We passed it by, actually, the first time around (walked twice as far as we had to, HAH), but found it on our second try. We took pictures before the cold drove us to find our way to dinner.

Dinner was Ellen's Stardust Diner, at my insistence. I had forgotten exactly which street MMSK (my middle school) stayed at when we visited in eighth grade, so we ended up going a subway stop farther than we had to -- which ended up being a good thing, because we got to see the Gap ad in Times Square with the cast of Spring Awakening!

Ellen's was freaking amazing, as always. It's this fifties throwback diner, with a ~*singing wait staff*~ (mostly Broadway star wannabes, I think?). It has classic American fare (but really flipping tasty) -- Amy H and I both got 'the Elvis, with bananas', which is a triple-decker PB&J sandwich with fries and a pickle, while Sarah S got grilled cheese. My throat was bugging me, so I had peppermint tea as well, while Sarah had lemonade, &c &c &c. They sang songs from Grease, and Phantom of the Opera, and Sound of Music, and Hairspray, and various other absolutely amazing songs ('Freddy, My Love', 'I Love Rock&Roll', 'Greased Lightning', and 'Great Balls of Fire' were the highlights!), including Happy Birthday to one of the customers there. It's so phenomenal and fun there! Amy AND Sarah can attest to this.

After that, we bought one-ride subway passes, to get to the reading for the night, but the subway wasn't COMING for some reason, and we would have had to take a taxi (shorter ride, less money) once we got to our stop, so the tickets ended up being extraneous. We got a cab, and got down to the reading eventually (with some time to spare), which was pretty freaking amazing. Sarah was brilliantly funny, and there were some really poignant pieces, too.

Afterwards, some of the girls decided to go to Lombardi's (I think? Someplace nearby.), but Sarah S, Amy H, and I were waiting on Amy G and her husband, and by the time we got to Lombardi's (it would have been my second dinner. I was SO not hungry, but I wanted to try their pizza :|), but we couldn't find our group, so we ended up just hugging Sarah S goodbye (she's leaving tomorrow, SO upsetting, but I am firm in my belief that we'll see here again eventually) and taking a cab back to the apartment.

And now, as I type this up, Amy and I are making plans to visit our hosts next door and maybe watch a movie and eat cookies before heading
off to bed. So much fun!

Okay, so someone in this apartment building has this like. THUMPING NOISE going from dawn till dusk and it's really quite. Eerie? no. Odd? yes. Terrifying? perhaps. IT IS A MYSTERY. I WANT TO KNOW WHAT THIS THUMPING IS, BUT, THEN AGAIN, I REALLY DON'T.

here's wishing Justine a very happy birthday, and everyone else a very happy unbirthday,

Greetings from Lexington again!

SO. NYC on Saturday (and a little bit of Sunday).

Amy H and I woke up relatively early (especially for a Saturday) and walked down to the bakery right next door to Katz's Deli for raspberry lintzer tarts (me) and... whatever Amy had (her). Afterwards, we walked back to the apartment and chilled, eating and eating and eating :| (and checking emails, &c) until Amy G and Peter had checked out the RED site (redthebook.com!) and stuff and were ready to go out to lunch.

We walked from our quite easterly location (Avenue C, people. You don't get much farther east than that) to the Peanut Butter and Company restaurant in Greenwich Village. We passed through a cute little street fair on the way, which had really yummy-smelling grilled food and really gorgeous scarves, but we didn't stop. For lunch at the PB&Co, I got the The Heat Is On sandwich, which was ~*spicy*~ peanut butter sandwich with 'chilled grilled chicken' and pineapple jam, (And, um. it really was spicy) and a chocolate egg cream a la Harriet the Spy. And I--- forget what Amy H had, but it had cinnamon and honey and was on a bagel and it looked really good, too. (She got a vanilla egg cream. Amy G got the EXACT same thing. Apparently it's an Amy thing? ;) hah. I unfortunately don't remember what Peter got.)

After lunch, we walked through the NYU campus a little bit and ended up Washington Square Park, where there was this crazy street show going on. It scandalized me a little - it was highly racist and sexist - but the men doing it were apparently playing off the Avenue Q theory that 'everyone's a little bit racist' or something, and rightfully so, because there was a lot of laughter. It was pretty talented, but I feel kind of stick-in-the-mudish about it, because I was too shocked to really enjoy it (the drummer was fantastic, though, and the Human Helicopter was impressive).

And then Amy H and I took a cab in an uptownly direction, to the New World Theater for Altar Boyz. Altar Boyz is a play about a Christian boy band, and it was totally amazing and hilarious. After the show, Amy H and I had several discussions that went much along the lines of:

Amy: JUAN WAS SO GORGEOUS
Me: no bb, Abraham was the gorgeous one.
Amy: Juan!
Me: ABRAHAM!! ..okay so Juan had great hair, I'll give him that, but HELLO ABRAHAM.

ahem. So the play was amazing, and Amy and I got our picture taken with the Boyz afterwards (money went towards AIDS relief and *** cancer awareness in the NYC area) and hit the merchandise table for the Carols for a Cause CD (same as above; each Broadway and some off-Broadway casts sang Christmas songs and proceeds go towards AIDS and *** cancer relief) (me) and shirts (both of us: Amy got a generic Altar Boyz shirt and I got a 'You Make Me Wanna Wait' tee.)

Afterwards, we hit the streets. I got a kebab from a vendor and we wandered around, found the Spring Awakening theater (with strikers outside) and examined the posters outside. We browsed Times Square and then headed off in the vague direction of the Saint Thomas Church (because I remembered the carvings from eighth grade and wanted to visit again). We stopped at Saks Fifth Avenue and ended up going up eight floors to look at the shoe department 'that is so big it gets its own zip code!'. Most of the shoes were gorgeous and at least $300 :|. On the first floor, I had my eyes open for Coach, because I couldn't find any vendors for fake Coach and my sister wanted fake Coach purses for her birthday (today), so I figured I'd get her the real thing.

After Saks, we headed back in the general direction of Broadway. Passing by the Rockefeller Center and Plaza and stuff, I noticed a Coach store on the other side of the street, so Amy and I crossed the street at the next intersection, walked back a block, and I proceeded to wibble for approximately fifteen minutes about putting down such a LARGE sum of money on such a SMALL purse-thing (I ended up doing it. My sister's ecstatic that she has a REAL Coach bag, no matter how small). After Coach, Amy and I walked to the Anthropologie store about a block away, where I called mom to say, OKAY I JUST SPENT ALMOST A [insert large sum of money here] ON THESE TWO TINY THINGS THAT ARE AUTHENTIC COACH FOR PORTIA ~*WHAT*~ DID I JUST DO (I was hyperventilating a little) but she calmed me down.

Then, Amy and I started heading towards Ellen's Stardust Diner (again :|) but the lines were vastly long and out the door, so we ended up sitting at Sbarro for about forty-five minutes before heading back in the general direction of the Spring Awakening strike.

We didn't end up meeting Hayley H, as plans had gone, but in the ~20, 25 minutes we hung around the strikers (the cast wasn't required to show, so we didn't get to see them), we met this somewhat creepy woman who is like OBSESSED with Spring Awakening. She's seen it six times already, and took a train from the DC area earlier Saturday to see it Saturday night and the Sunday matinée (was there a Sunday matinée? Some show on Sunday, anyhow), and she brought PRESENTS for everyone on the cast and was all, oh I know them I know that they'll be here, &c and stuff and idk. She gave me this weird creepy sort of vibe, so I sort of stayed away from her.

Oh! But we saw RED author Jasmin S and one of her friends walking along near there. They saw part of the cast, which did show up during the time of the matinée. It was cool seeing them one last time (small world! I swear!)

Anyhow after the strike was struck at 7:30, Amy and I took a cab back down to Amy and Peter's, where we tossed all our purchases and bags &c onto our respective piles of junk (me) and suitcases (her), and headed over to Amy and Peter's actual apartment for Project Runway and, um. four episodes of Heroes. One of their cats (she likes licking hairlines?) licked my hairline a bit, and I pet her a lot, which was nice, because. I was missing my cats somewhat horribly. (They kept making these jokes about how they were MAKING ME WATCH TV D: and how when I write the follow-up essay that's coming in the follow-up book that's supposed to happen in fifteen, twenty years (?right?) I'll say, ...AND THEY MADE ME WATCH TV!! or something. Hah.

And then we got back to our end of things and I hastily piled everything clothing-related in my suitcase and haphazardly piled everything else up in a more or less organized fashion and ate rice krispies and half a snickers bar and brushed my teeth (OH HOW DETAILED I'M GETTING) and set my alarm for early and went to bed.

My alarm didn't wake me up.

Amy G came over around seven, and I got up and finished packing. When I was finished, I decided I HAD to go on the rooftop terrace, because it was THERE and I hadn't been on it yet, so I stepped out and looked the city of New York face-on for one last time before finishing up a few things and getting all my bags down to the front. Amy G helped us carry things downstairs (her husband was still in bed) and stuff and we were all ready when our car for the airport came. And then there was the whole airport deal, checking in, getting through security, sleeping on the plane, landing, getting the toiletries bag that we checked, and heading home. And now! I'm back home, the laptop has a zillion viruses, and my sister has a birthday makeover. (she's stoked about the Coach)

I am so pumped for dinner! And Thanksgiving, because I really want some corn pudding. I kind of wish we hadn't had to leave so soon, BUT it was an amazing three-odd days, and I'm so glad I got to have them. AND! The book is getting all of these RAVE REVIEWS and stuff. It's pretty incredibly exciting. I'm, like, shocked. SHOCKED AND SLIGHTLY AMAZED. I am in AWE. This is so freaking cool. (HEY! BOYS! YOU'RE NEXT! potentially there's going to be a book JUST LIKE THIS for boys. Amy G is going to keep me posted, and I'll let you know if she starts wanting submissions from male adolescents!) Did I mention an Oprah associate or something was at the official party?

Happy birthday to my most darling sister, and here's hoping everyone else is having a fantastic day,

PS; Uncle G, when mom forwards this to you, I am, like, so ~*totally*~ not like talking or, like, typing like a, like, valley girl! like. ;)

gmail advert says, 'this is new york city' (another one says 'maltese puppies for sale' :|).

saskiab — Thu, 15 Nov 2007 18:27:00 GMT

SO. At this moment in time, RED author Amy H and I are sitting here, in Amy Goldwasser's office, contemplating getting ready for the RED party and also 'borrowing' Amy G's music. We've already had bagels with her, and used her computer (well. I have) and met her cats.

THIS is so cool.

In the airport we left from, there was this really cute guy in line for tickets right behind us, and we conversated about carryons before he went off to CHICAGO (how lame; he should have gone to NYC, too, and sat next to one of us on the flight).

I actually don't have all that much to say. It's super exciting to be here, and I keep having these like. These moments of realization, that this is ~*really happening*~, and it's happening now, and it's happening to me, but I'm also kind of tired after very little sleep last night (our flight left at 6:00 am, and we simply ~*had*~ to watch Gossip Girl before going to bed (Blair/Chuck OTP? I think so.)) and kind of onion-breathed from breakfast. So I think I'm going to take a nap and, like, get stoked. I don't even know.

I look forward to seeing 34 (33, technically, because Amy H is here with me now) of the other authors at the party tonight! I simply cannot wait.

dflgjh this is such a lame post. I fail at blogging.

gmail advert says: 'bra training for men'.

saskiab — Tue, 16 Oct 2007 04:34:00 GMT

It's 12:35 am and I should be sleeping, but the crickets outside are chirping and the one inside is busy tying to do me in, and there are barbeque potato chips and bowls of candy corn and cups of apple cider to keep me awake, and, although I am a little tired, I'm not tired enough to worry about how tired I will be when I wake up in the morning (or perhaps I'm too tired to worry about it; who knows?)

I currently have more emails in my Drafts folder than my inbox: notes to self, links to online quiz results, an article that proves just how... 'funny' (we'll call it funny) Zac Efron can be when he tries, and something that is, apparently, entirely blank. I've been spending the last few hours synthesizing notes for tests I have this week, next week, in a hundred weeks, and really I'm sure that, when all is said and done, I'll forget I made these notes to begin with.

I am okay with forgetting about these notes.

Today RED writer Amy H and I discussed the essays and clothes we should wear to the release party, and as we 'sampled' free food at the mall, we talked about shoes and ships and sealing wax, of cabbages and kings*, essentially. It was pretty rad. The essays are pretty rad. More than 'pretty rad', really. Completely amazing and devastaing and tear-jerking and laugh-inducing and everything, all at once. I have two people (friends and family) that have requested books signed by every RED author I might chance to meet in November. I'm stoked. They're stoked. Life is good, and I'm beginning to get tired.

So while the world sleeps, and crickets both stalk and chirp, I'll bring this to a close. Maybe I'll finish RED tonight. Likely, I won't: I have to take it slow with this book. Each word is precious and demands worlds of attention (that, and homework is deviously getting in the way of my reading time), and, as such, I'm only just over halfway done. And what an amazing half it is, too.

Right, I feel like an infomercial now. Sleep.

*Louis Carroll; "The Walrus and the Carpenter"