So today, while I was looking around the kitchen and thinking of making either crepes or angel food cake (then finding out we had no flour), I realized that my opinions on things are always very definite. My opinions are RIGHT, dude. They are FACT. And they are never, ever iffy.
Like, I never (or at least rarely) think things are ‘okay’ or ‘pretty good’. No, I have SOLID opinions. I hate something or I love it. I never just think it’s alright. The problem with this is that when I change my mind about something it is a big deal. My family says things like, “wait - I thought you hated this song,” and I have to be all, “well, I did… and now I don’t,” and they pretty much just think I’m crazy, most likely.
My family thinks I’m crazy an awful lot. Of course, everyone in my family (immediate and extended) thinks that everyone else is crazy, all the time. And I am no exception to this. (In fact, when I was younger I think everyone probably thought I was the craziest one of all. Actually, this might still be true. No matter. I embrace the crazy that I am.)
But anyway. What was I talking about? Oh yes. Things I HATE and things I LOVE.
Things the Jordyn hates:
1. Gossip Girl - the books and the show.
2. Amy Winehouse, especially that Rehab song. Just go already and quit whining about it.
3. People saying things about how wonderful it must be to be so young and so, so healthy. Pshhh.
4. High School Musical.
5. People with the I-know-everything-about-life-and-no-one-else-knows-anything complex. Especially when they are my age because come on, not even Einstein knew it all when he was a teenager.
6. Scoffing at the fact that someone likes to read and/or write.
7. Talk radio where everyone is just mostly arguing. See point number 5, because these people always think they’ve got it all figured out.
8. The obsession with Miley Cyrus/Hannah Montana. SHE’S EVERYWHERE!!
9. Doctor Zhivago, the movie. The only character I liked was his wife, whatever her name was. I felt bad for her though, having to put up with everyone else in the movie.
10. Awkward dialogue on television. See number 4.
11. When perfectly skinny girls feel the need to talk about dieting and “watching their weight.” (Honestly I could go all Freudian on this one and say this is a direct result of being overly-cautious to notdo that since so many people seemed to be convinced I was anorexic back in mid school and junior high. Which, yanno, Freud! wasn’t a total whack job, so maybe that’s true?) (I bet you’re wondering about the ! on Freud, huh? It’s a Friends reference, lol.)
12. David Archuletta. If he wins I will be devastated. DEVASTATED, I TELL YOU! DEVASTATED!
Things the Jordyn loves:
1. The Hills, even if it is vapid, superficial, and most likely fake.
2. The Paper. Am I the only one that thinks Amanda likes Alex? If you watch this show, please respond with your answer on this most important matter. But seriously, it’s like a Greek play or something. Amanda likes Alex! Alex is trying to steal the in-chief position from Amanda! Everyone hates Amanda anyway! (And also, Adam went to High School Musical on ice? Seriously? That’s really just embarrassing.)
4. Blogging, hence the obsessiveness.
5. Friends who live 800 miles away yet are still sending me a graduation invitation. (Thanks, Ash!) (And, also, just my friends in general. Also, family.)
6. Listening to wonderfullest music. Like Avril Lavigne, Taylor Swift, Kate Voegele, Fountains of Wayne, and anything hillbilly.
7. My phone. It is orange! It is an env! It stores up to 100 notes! (A function which, trust me, I make great use of.)
8. Cooking, which the Jordyn used to hate. But then she watched a week of Food Network while she was sick and - boom! - now she is a cooking fool! Just yesterday she made crepes with whipped cream that she whipped herself!
9. Inside jokes.
10. Quotes. Wonderful, wonderful quotes.
11. Offbeat names. Kiley! Johnson (for a first name)! Jenner! Roo! Ashton! Kelso! Tally! I am all about names that are just a little different.
12. David Cook. If he does not win I will likewise be devastated. See point 12 in the list of hates.
So there you have it. Things I hate and things I love, and if you look at points 1, 4, 8, and 12 on the hates list as well as points 1, 2, and 12 on the loves list (as well as secret point 13, which was going to be House), you will see that my crusade to make you all believe I spend a zillion hours a day watching telly is still in effect. AND IT IS GOING WONDERFULLY!!
(Oh and also, don’t forget - do you think Amanda has a crush on Alex? Answer! If you watch The Paper! Because otherwise you have no idea what I’m talking about!)