It happened like this:
Apparently I got a box from Amazon in the mail. I say apparently because it showed up at our house and it had my name on it.
Only I didn’t order anything from Amazon. I know this because when I am expecting a package I am neurotic about checking the mail and waiting impatiently for it and so on and so forth. But this time I wasn’t being neurotic or impatient or anything. In fact, you might say that when the Jordyn looked at the box she was like, Huh? Where did this come from? Does it contain a bomb that will detonate in my face? WHO IS OUT TO GET ME!?
Then the Jordyn started thinking, This is not right. Maybe I did order something from Amazon. And then, Nah, that is impossible. So I began to open the box. And inside were those weird air-filled sacks Amazon sends sometimes in place of regular ole fashioned packing peanuts. You know what I mean.
However, underneath the super-duper-Amazon-air-packaging was something flat that was green stripedy and resembled sheets. Honestly, I am not kidding you, I thought, Oh, gee, Mom ordered sheets for me. Because, yeah, that’s the sort of weird way my brain works.
Turns out it wasn’t sheets though! It was gift wrap! And cue the Jordyn, still confused and also pretty stupid because SHE REALLY THOUGHT IT WAS GREEN SHEETS THERE FOR A SECOND. But anways, attached to this lovely green gift wrap was a nice little wonderful card from my mommy that was full of sentimental goodness and OMG THE JORDYN STILL DOESN’T KNOW WHAT IS INSIDE THE WRAPPING PAPER BECAUSE SHE IS OBVIOUSLY DUMB AS A ROCK AND SLOW AS A TURTLE (yes, I love similies although maybe those two were a bit much).
And what was it?
It was the amazing, the splendiforous, Oh, the Places You’ll Go! Woohoo!!
Also, remind me to tell you guys about the time I saw bank robbers. It was thrilling!