One minute I feel like an insignificant speck on this vast planet, the next I feel like I’m on top of the world. It’s so strange…
I know I should march through life like it’s a project to be worked on but sometimes I feel so lost in the shuffle. I want to keep going and doing but I inevitably stop and I ask myself why? What for? And the only relevant answer has nothing to do with babies to feed or money to make. The only response I can ever internalize is; because I have to… Because no one is going to do it for me. Because I occupy my body and I’m stuck with it. If I Stop, I will be lost in introspection, I must keep pushing further and trust that some good will come. I just want to speak my mind and hope that I can make money doing that…. And sometimes I don’t think I’m good enough but honestly success really isn’t measured in talent- Its measures in perseverance. There are tons of talentless nobodies making a fortune and tons of creative geniuses stuck in the oblivion of insanity. I am not so conceded that I can speak my mind believing that I deserve the attention. But I know I have to continue to express myself I because if I didn’t I would really be nothing. I would have no purpose. I was born with an ever-spinning wheel of perception and I need to use it or render myself useless. Hopefully somewhere along the lines I can inspire somebody and live for some other reason than to just be. Hopefully I will cause little suffering and lots of joy. Then I guess life is my creative project and like all of my projects I am compelled to make it distinctly mine. Hey Jordyn, thanks for being my audience. I really do appreciate it. I believe in what I have to say but sometimes that’s not enough you know… thanks for that little something extra. It helps, really it does.