Your Smile On Fire

...from the song Xavia
  • i finally own pixar

    So I’ve been thinking, friendlies. You have to have a certain amount of ego to post your life on the internets in the form of bloggeryness. I mean, even if you don’t think of yourself as a particularly narcissistic person (I don’t), there still must be a little bit of that if you think anyone is interested in reading about your daily life.

     

    I mean, I think we call all pretty much agree that daily life is, for the most part, boring. Get up, do whatever it is you do, and then go to bed. AND DON’T YOU JUST HATE THOSE PEOPLE WHO BLOG INCESSENTLY ABOUT THEIR SLEEP TROUBLES?

     

    But anyways. Wanna hear about yesterday?

     

    Well I’m telling you either way.

     

    Yesterday I realized this long summer stretching out ahead of me. You know, now that I’m not getting a job. The reasons for me not getting a job are complex and many-layered, but trust me you would understand if you lived in my family; things are always up in the air, we’re never quite sure what’s going on until it happens. And so now that I’m not getting a job I pretty much have nothing to do. I mean, writing of course, and babysitting if that happens, but other than that… wow.

     

    The future is, like, empty. Which I figure makes it a good time to go over my summer goals and see which ones I can accomplish. Maybe make some amendments over at the Goals page?

     

    In addition to realizing the blankness of the summer ahead, I also got DISNEY-PIXAR MONOPOLY. And you would know how huge this is if you knew the four’s longstanding history with Monopoly. It started one summer a few years before the move, when we played EVERY SINGLE DAY. And it continued. On. And on. And on. And now whenever we get together we just HAVE TO PLAY MONOPOLY and I’ve been saying I’d buy the Disney version forever.

     

    And I finally have.

     

    And Taylor the Lovely beat me at it yesterday, but is that really surprising to anyone? I once played with a friend and I HAD NINE HOTELS and SHE HAD THREE HOUSES… AND SHE WON. Not even kidding.

     

    In any case, the Disney-Pixar version is adorable. The houses are traffic cones! The hotels are barns! You can be Sully or Nemo or Buzz or Mr. Incredible or Remy or Lightning McQueen! All of the properties are places from the movies! You can actually own the Sewers of Paris! Or Andy’s Room! And, yes, I realize I am beginning to sound like a commercial but I LOVE DISNEY-PIXAR MONOPOLY. (Really? Does this really surprise you? I mean it combines two of my favorite things: Pixar and Monopoly. All it needs to make it more awesome is the cone of silence.)

  • a life in words

    Do you ever get that feeling in you that you just have to write? Even though you really have nothing to write about and your mind isn’t actually coming up with anything, you still need the feeling of fingers on a keyboard and thoughts flowing onto the screen?

     

    It’s what’s happening to me right now. 11:11 at night, my sister in the trundle bed, me sitting on my bed (on my new mattress!) in my pajamas, listening to my finetune, needing to write. 

     

    This is why I’ll become a writer. Simply because I’m so submerged in it, practically drowning, passionate, obsessed, whatever you want to call it. I’m that girl who practices her cello seven hours a day, hoping that eventually she’ll get a chance to play Carnegie Hall. Except instead of a cello I’ve got a keyboard, and instead of Carnegie Hall I’ve got visions of the NYTimes Bestsellers list dancing in my head. I try to remember when this started and I can’t; I get the feeling it goes back as far as I do, maybe even before the days of Hooked-on-Phonics and Easy Readers.

     

    I remember staying up nights back when me and Taylor the Lovely shared a room, telling her stories about teddybears come alive, about fairies who lived in the forest, my own Betsy-Tacy-Tib stories. I remember her falling asleep, my voice still alive in the dark, knowing the stories were no good but not caring enough to stop. Just telling them, even if they sucked, was of an utmost importance to me, and she always seemed to like them no matter how awful they were.

     

    I remember second grade, writing short stories that were terrible but that I loved. Stories that weren’t entirely fiction as they were peopled with the characters from my real life - me and my sister, our cousins, my parents and grandparents - I hadn’t yet mastered the concept of reality v. fantasy, but I knew I wanted to create stories, create entire worlds, in my head.

     

    I remember my frosh year English teacher, Mrs. Peterson. I remember the ‘F’ I got on my first paper in her class, how I cried when I got home and later found out I wasn’t the first freshman girl she’d made cry. I remember her ’show don’t tell’ stamp and all the red marks on my papers. I remember standing at her desk as she outlined everything that was wrong, telling me to rewrite it; I traded my F’s for D’s and D’s for C’s and, eventually, my C’s for B’s. I took note of her criticism, wanting to be able to make the words work together the way I envisioned them. Wanting to make my words flow, make my thoughts flawless on the page. I wanted perfection, which I have never, probably will never, achieve in my writing.

     

    And now I am older, past bedtime stories of teddybears and fairies, past the shoddy half-fictions, and still trying to make it all work. Still trying to get the words how I see them. I imagine this must be what an artist struggles with, wanting what is on the canvas to capture what he sees in his mind, what he wants the rest of the world to be able to also see.

     

    I don’t know what drives this whatever you call it, this compusion, this obsession, this passion. All I know is that it doesn’t end. I format sentences in my head, I narrate my life in first-person, often from the time I wake up until the time I drift to sleep. I see scenes and characters where there is no story and am faced with the challenge of creating a world for them to inhabit. It is frustrating and time-consuming, and I love it. I have never thought that maybe this isn’t for me, that maybe I should consider sanity and make teaching my Plan A. I have never thought that if I never make it, if I am never in a Barnes and Noble, never get reviewed in even the smallest of newspapers, that I will stop writing.

     

    There is no doubt that I couldn’t stop even if I wanted to.

  • so many books, so little room

    So,

     

    Thing Number Six:

     

    The Jordyn’s bookshelves are becoming crowded.

     

    I know I’ve probably mentioned this before, but I’d fixed the problem since then. Until now. Because yesterday I was at Costco and oh lordy, I bought both Twilight and New Moon. AND DO YOU GUYS HAVE ANY IDEA HOW THICK THOSE BOOKS ARE? Seriously. I may as well have bought a couple of copies of Gone With the Wind.

     

    I mean don’t get me wrong, I’m very excited to read these books and see what all of the hullaballoo (ooh, fun word!) is about, but oh dear I’m going to have to find room on my shelves. And how can I do this? I’ve already pushed all my Nancy Drew books to the back of the shelves… I can’t hide more of my books.

     

    Oh dear.

     

    Oh dear oh dear oh dear.

     

    You know…

     

    it’s possible that I need a new bookcase. One that is bigger. And not fifteen gazillion years old. (Really, friendlies, I’ve had this bookcase since I was, like, ten. And I don’t even think it was new when I got it.)

  • another the jordyn report

    First things first; I’ve started a page for Project for Self on the wordpress blog. Just named the page P.S. though because that’s so much shorter. So go, join, leave comments (I love comments!), and whatever.

     

    Now on with it. I don’t have anything specific to write about, but a new PS post should be in the works shortly, so I’ll just do a bullet point post of news in my world.

     

    That’s right, it’s THE JORDYN REPOR(T)!

    • Family is visiting soon! Family such as Clintard (Clint) and his kids (Mason and Layla) and then just a little after that in comes my dad’s other brother and his wife and kid (Kendall, Janice, Parker). SO MUCH FAMILY! So much loveliness! Having kids around again for a while! The one thing I’m really hoping for the upcoming visits is that I get the chance to go fishing with Dad and Clintard. Other than that, pretty much just hanging out and watching the kids and family, family everywhere.
    • I bought the following things (not all today, but recently): Twilight and New Moon from Costco (they were cheap cheap there so I got the first two); Julianne Hough’s CD, which I may or may not have mentioned is made of pure awesome; Toby Keith’s 35 Biggest Hits, also awesome, listening to it right now. It’s very possible that country music and iced tea are my two greatest miracle things - miracle drink and miracle music. Love them.
    • My friend is graduating this week and I’m going to her grad night dinner this weekend. Excited? Yes. I haven’t really done anything with people besides my family in a really super long time. Besides the fact that working/looking for a job and finals had taken over my life, there just wasn’t much opportunity. So this will be fun and out of the ordinary and yes, I’m excited.
    • I talked to Madis on the phone yesterday and I was like, “Guess what movie’s coming out?” And she goes, “Lots of movies are coming out.” And I go, “Yeah, but which one am I excited for?” And she says, “Umm… probably… GET SMART.” YES! YES YES YES!!!
    • My head has been in a fog lately. Whether this is from running around like crazy busy, not feeling so great, sleeping too much, or just general oddness I’m not sure. It’s really bugging me though. (I slept like forever today AND I’M TIRED AGAIN. Urgh.)
    • I have a new mattress. I know this is of the greatest interest to you all and that’s why I tell you.
    • My mother will be pleased to know that I’ve transferred some of my files (actually lots of them) to discs. You know, in case this thing crashes before I can get my shiny new Mac. (Oh dear I hope that doesn’t happen - I can’t be without a computer! I shall perish!)
  • screaming in bookstores and making secret goals

    Hey hey hey friendlies!

     

    Yesterday I screamed inside a Barnes and Noble. Not Taylor-loud (they probably would have kicked me out), but loud enough that the other girl in the aisle looked at me like I was crazy.

     

    But I had a good excuse. A really, really good excuse. I was there to get a few grad gifts for people (done! and wrapped! and not all from bn!) and so I’m wandering around the YA section and you guys know how they have that little Nonfic-YA shelf?

     

    THIS WAS WHAT I SAW ON IT.

     

    Do you see that? Do you see those two books that say RED on them? Oh. Freaking. Em. Gee. I was freaking out. I was like I have to tell someone, I have to tell someone! So I called my mom and then texted a few of my friends and I felt like doing a little happy dance right there in the store but I restrained myself.

     

    But oh my gosh. I’m in that book. That is in Barnes and Noble. That is coming out in paperback. Me. Me, me, me. My words. I know it came out in November, and I know I found out in February or something like that, but friendlies? It still feels surreal.

     

    In other news, I bought Julianne Hough’s CD and yes, it is great. Go buy it. Unless you really just can’t stand country. In which case you are missing out.

     

    **************************************************************************

     

    And changing gears again, let’s talk about Project for Self (go read it and join if you haven’t yet). Because I’ve got three people who’ve joined (yay!) and I’ve been thinking.

     

    It’s really easy to say you’re going to start going after life and doing the things you really want to do, but it’s a whole other thing to actually go through with it. So think of something you want to do, maybe something you’ve wanted to do for a while, but haven’t yet because you’re too afraid or it just seems crazy. You don’t have to say what it is (but you can), it can be your SECRET GOAL and it can be anything. Being more outgoing, getting to know someone you’ve wanted to know for a while, making a new friend, asking your crush out, making up with a friend you’ve been fighting with or even lost because of a fight. Whatever it is that you’ve wanted to do but haven’t. Then start to make it happen. Baby steps, like talking to the Starbucks barista if you’re trying to be more outgoing, saying hi to that person you want to become your friend, calling or texting your lost friend to see how she/he’s doing.

     

    Let’s all think of our secret goals (or not secret goals, it doesn’t matter but sometimes it’s just easier to do things if you don’t have people knowing about what it is, for some reason) and take the first step. (I may or may not open up a Project for Self page on the wordpress blog for people to let us know how their secret goals are going, even if they don’t want to tell what the goal is.) Thanks to Erin, Jocelyn, and Jamie for joining me in this!

  • project for self

    Everyone seems to be waiting for their lives to begin. Waiting to get into college, waiting to get married, waiting to move out, waiting to travel. Waiting for any number of things and I’m sure it has a lot to do with this whole time of transition that everyone around my age is in, but it just seems odd the more I look at it. Because guys, this is our life. This. Right now. It’s began.

     

    I don’t think we should be sitting here waiting for life to happen to us; we have to get up and make our lives happen. If we want something for ourselves, whether that something is to travel or get into NYU or whatever it may be, we have to take steps to make that happen. We have to be proactive. If you know what you want out of this life, stand up and make it happen. Stop waiting. Because even though good things are supposed to come to those who wait, I’m thinking better things probably come to those who care enough to pursue them.

     

    And as for the things we really do have to wait for? Like moving out, like getting married, like graduating college or getting into whatever feild we’re looking at… well, we just have to step back and relax. Things are going to happen. They’re just not all happening right this very second, as annoying as that so often is. I’m not a person who believe in fate or predestination, but I do think that things tend to happen at the right time and that you shouldn’t get all freaked out over it.

     

    Part of the thing with my summer goals is that I realized I can’t keep waiting for things to happen. That there are a lot of things not in my control, but I think if I busy myself with the things I do have some control over life will be better overall. I want to be more like a character in a novel, and by that I mean… well, I mean look at the following quote about great characters, from Donald Maass’ amazing book Writing the Breakout Novel;

     

    They say the things we wish we had said. They do things we dream about doing. They grow and change in ways we wish that we could. They feel things authentically and without turning away.

     

    I want to be like that. I want to be the sort of person who isn’t afraid of saying what she wants to say or doing what she wants to do, and I think that’s what most people want. We want to be uninhibited by our stupid little fears. We want to go after what we want but because we’re small little humans, we don’t. Another quote I love on this subject is from The Second Summer of the Sisterhood and is talking about Lena;

     

    She got tired of herself. She got tired of not being able to say what she wanted or do what she wanted or even want what she wanted.

     

    I’m afraid that too many of us can probably identify with that. A lot of times we act how we think others want us to act, and it’s not because it would be wrong for us to act otherwise, it’s just because the gazes of our fellow humans seem to always be upon us and we worry about what they will think, even when we tell outselves we don’t really care what the norm is or what others think of us. We’re human. We care. And sometimes we sit around and wait instead of going after what we want.

     

    So my new resolve (and comment below if you want to join with me on this one) is to be more unafraid of saying what I really want and doing what I really want and living the life I really want. Join me in pursuing and catching life instead of letting it pass me by, and in being the sort of unafraid person I want to be. I’m calling it the Project for Self; who’s with me? (I’ll be posting more on this later if anyone says they wanna join in on this resolution.)

  • that's funny right there

    I was all snug as a bug asleep in my bed when a (fairly small) earthquake woke me up. And the room was so dark and I was coming out of such a deep sleep that I had this woo-ooo-oo feeling like; Am I the last person left? Is there going to be another earthquake? Where am I? So of course I had to run upstairs and check that there were family up there (no I didn’t really think I was the last one left but I was kinda spooked) and now I’m eating Rocky Road while blogging.

     

    Soon I hope to be making crepes for my sissy’s breakfast.

     

    In other news, yesterday I was talking to my dad (a text conversation) about my new goal of going to see a concert this summer. Anyway, I’d found one, but it’s country and my dad’s going to be out of town the day of it, so the following conversation happened when he suggested I take my friend to the concert with me;

     

    me: She hates country.

     

    Dad: What? Has she listened to people like Tim M or toby K?

     

    me: Yeah.

     

    Dad: Taylor Swift, Shania twain, Keith Urban??? She hates all??

     

    me: Yes she says it is all “let’s go out in the pasture and kill ourselves.” Those are her exact words.

     

    Dad: OMG!!

     

    That was funny, right? That was funny right there.

  • summer goalage

    So my friend did a post of her summer goals, so now it’s my turn. It seems like a good idea to do, you know? Make it all official like.

     

    The Jordyn’s Summer Goals:

     

    1. Get a new job. (Remember how I said yesterday was awful? I lost my job. The owner is moving her business so unless I’m willing to drive like 40 minutes each way, I’m out of a job. Ergo, I’m out of a job.)
    2. Buy MacBook. (Getting a job is pretty imperative to this goal.)
    3. Go to a concert. (Preferably soon, cheaply, and an artist I really want to see.)
    4. See Bradison and Madley if at all possible.
    5. Have at least 20,000 words to my novel by the end of the summer.
    6. Be a better friend and cousin.
    7. Call my granma more often, like at least once a week. (Does this mean being a better granddaughter too?)
    8. Stop waking up so late.
    9. Work on getting an agent for Dusty Red Shoes.
    10. Try to get into freelance writing.
    11. Make it to the meetings.
    12. Find another TV show to buy DVDs of after I get a job. (Suggestions anyone? I already have The Office and my mom has Friends.) (Okay, yeah, I know this isn’t exactly meaningful, but it’s fun.)
    13. See Get Smart.
  • not what i signed up for

    Dear friendlies, this post comes in four parts.

     

    Part 1

     

    Was really, really bad. Like seriously.

     

    Part 2

     

    I read something terribly sad about next season in TVGuide magazine while I was in line at Albie’s. I just found it online at tvguide.com, and here it is. WARNING: Sad.

     

    Executive Producer Katie Jacobs says: I don’t think their relationship will ever be the same. Wilson [Robert Sean Leonard] has been cleaning up after the elephant for years. Because House [Hugh Laurie] is so self-absorbed, he relies on Wilson to [fix] his mess. This time it really cost him. It’s sad because they had come to an understanding of how Wilson falling in love affects and folds into their friendship, but House just can’t resist being who he is—wounded, lovable and funny, but also selfish. The audience should worry about the future of their relationship. The devastating thing for House is that Wilson was his lifeline and now that he’s lost that, he’ll have to think about the way he is living his life.

     

    Ack! It’s so so bad, right? Hopefully it will be one of those things where they eventually fix things over the course of the season. I mean, they can’t totally fall out, can they? Because that is NOT what I signed up for when I started watching House.

     

    Part 3

     

    I have to see a concert. Today after work there was a concert going on at the mall and they roped off the little aisle thingy I had to walk through to get to my car because THE BAND (which I have never heard of but they must be a real band, because they were having a concert there) WAS WALKING ON STAGE. And as they were walking onstage I heard them talking and laughing about something and it reminded me of the current novel I was working on and how it’s probably not a great thing that I don’t know anything about the atmosphere of a concert/show when a band plays. I mean considering the main characters of my novel are in a band that plays gigs pretty often.

     

    So yeah, now the Jordyn is on a mission to find a concert. And, um, go to it. Preferably soon.

     

    Part 4

     

    This from the same person who told me I looked like I rolled out of bed and came to school, and from this how-to-not-make-friends file, you probably shouldn’t call someone a b**** just because they get a higher score than you on the final. Even if you think it’s funny and put “lol” after it… it’s still not funny.

     

    It’s. Just. Mean.

  • oh. so. tired.

    Oh. My. God.

     

    Continuing on in my Saga of Sleep, here’s what happened last night, I kid you not.

     

    It was about eleven o’clock. I had decided to restart my novel (coming in at a measly 5,000 words, this was not as big a deal as it seems) and work on it an hour every day. I was hoping to see which was the better goal: words per day or time per day. Anyways.

     

    So there it was, 11pm, and I was tired, so tired my eyelids were actually a bit droopy if you can believe that, and I decided I’d start this whole hour-a-day thing in the morning instead of right now. My brilliant logic being that if I started that night I’d be up until at least midnight, and possibly much longer depending on how it was going. (I have high hopes, yes?) So I shut down. Closed the computer, turned off the lights, got into my blankets and…

     

    time. dragged. on.

     

    From 11 to midnight. From midnight to 1. From 1 to 1:30 to 2 to 3 IN THE MORNING. Trust me, I wish I could give you guys the full effect of just how long my night was. I closed my eyes. I opened my eyes. I tried to sleep on my side, on my back, on my stomach. I tried thinking happy thoughts. I tried thinking no thoughts. I tried drinking water. I TRIED IT ALL.

     

    And yet I was still awake. Amazing.

     

    So around 3:30 I decided SLEEP WAS NOT MY FRIEND and got on my computer to do some research into what sort of computer I should get because, yes, I am getting a new computer. (And yes, I now know what kind and no, you cannot talk me out of it.) Now I just have to, you know, save up all that money. But anyways, I was on the computer until almost 4, at which point I laid back down again. Thinking I could now sleep, seeing as how it was getting into the wee hours of the morning so of course I would fall asleep and probably not be able to wake up until noon.

     

    But oh no. SLEEP IS NOT MY FRIEND, remember?

     

    It got to 4:30. 4:45. FIVE IN THE MORNING. FIVE FIFTEEN. And that was when I went upstairs to Taylor the Lovely’s room to see if she was awake yet for school and tell her of my night. Which she wasn’t awake, but I woke her up. And I told her how I HAD NOT SLEPT EVEN ONE LITTLE BIT. And her response, after I got done with the whole story (the short version, of course)? “Oh. Well why didn’t you go to sleep?”

     

    Argh!

     

    So now it’s 6:14 in the morning, I haven’t slept all night, I work this afternoon, and I’ve decided on getting a Mac. There. You happy?*

     

    *Forgive me if I am grouchy, for I have NOT SLEPT ALL NIGHT.

     

  • i call it the jordyn report

    Okay, new segment. Because I’m watching The Colbert Report (it inspired me) and also I know you’re all so interested in my life.

     

    So, friendlies, welcome to the new segment called THIS IS THE JORDYN REPORT! (And yes, you can pronounce the T in that word report.)

     

    For starters, this is one of the conversations I had with Taylor the Lovely today. I picked her up (in my car) while she was walking home from the bus stop, and we passed a kid who was walking up the hill I had “saved” Taylor from having to walk up.

     

    Taylor: That used to be me.

     

    me:…you used to be a little boy with blonde hair?

     

    Secondly, all those trailers for the Get Smart movie are getting me very excited for this movie. Now I realize it probably won’t be as wonderful as the show was, but hey, (a) Steve Carell is in it, (b) so is Ann Hathaway, (c) and the character of Seigfried (”This is kaos! Ve don’t shush here!”), (d) um, hello, it’s Get Smart.

     

    Thirdly, this morning when I woke up (and I must have not been sleeping very well because I woke up when Taylor came and turned my bathroom light on to steal something, and normally I’m a very heavy sleeper) I felt like someone had spent the night hitting my head with a hammer. Really, it was not pleasant and I still don’t feel very well and ugh. Just thought you all should know this.

     

    Fourthly, I had the strangest visual a few days ago. Here’s what happened: Taylor and my mommy went to H&M. I did not go. It sounded like something that would involve lots of shopping (with my mom and sister) and looking at clothes (with my mom and sister) and being asked by to try things on (by my mom and sister), so I elected to stay home. And anyways, they got home and Taylor was very excited to show me what new clothes she got at H&M and Forever 21. So I looked at them, and she said something like this about H&M: “There were all these people running around - it was crazy.”

     

    And, I swear to you, I got a visual. Of FASHION ZOMBIES running back and forth in H&M, waving their hands in the air like people do when they’re riding a rollercoaster, and screaming (also much like they do when on a rollercoaster). It was frikkin hilarious. I think I was kind of doubled over laughing while Taylor the Lovely kept saying, “What’s funny, why are you laughing? Jordyn, stop laughing at me! Are you laughing at me? What’s so funny?”

     

    The fashion zombies, friendlies. That was what was so funny. And I don’t know, maybe there will be more on these fashion zombies that apparently live in my mind.

  • don't mess with zulu cannibal giants

    One thing you probably shouldn’t say to someone if you want them to like you: “You look like you just rolled out of bed and came to school.”

     

    Yeah, you look pretty too.

     

    Um, no, I didn’t just roll out of bed and go to school. I straightened my hair. And messed with my bangs. And wore a not-hideous outfit (which if you know me, you know is saying a lot). And put on a mediocre amount of makeup. Plus, I ate. So I know I didn’t look like I just rolled out of bed. BUT OMG EVEN IF YOU THINK THAT - PROBABLY NOT A NICE THING TO SAY. Just FYI.

     

    But on another note. Every so often a new bunch of COMPLETELY AWESOME songs crops up and I just become obsessed with them. And they’re always (or, like, 99 out of 100 times) country. So all you country haters will just have to deal with it.

     

    The first one?

     

    That Song in My Head by newcomer Julianne Hough. Okay, I know she looks like Malibu Barbie and the guy in the video resembles Ken, but oh. my. gawd. I just love this song. Love love love! It’s perfect.

     

    Country Man by Luke Bryan. The only guy who has this song posted on YouTube (the actual song, not a performance) has an amazingly RACIST username, so I’m not going to link to it but you can search for it yourself if you like.

     

    Holler Back by The Lost Trailers (also new, I think). I’m linking to their myspace, which has the song on it. I love songs like this. It reminds me of Tim McGraw’s Back When.

     

    She’s A Hottie, Toby Keith’s latest. I know, I know, these are the type of songs that make people hate country. Um, I love them?

     

    I’m Done by Jo Dee Messina. Man. All of her songs are made of awesome. This one reminds me of My Give A Damn’s Busted though. Which, if you’re wondering, is a good thing. ;)

     

    Okay, I know at this point most of you (including my mother) are probably either judging or questioning my musical taste. But, dear mother (and everyone else), this is what you can expect to happen when you let your little baby girl listen to CMT NONSTOP and the first song she hears is Reba’s Fancy. Seriously.

     

    I know that was quite possible torture for some of you. Sorry bout that. I am just bursting with new music and new CDs I want to buy. (Julianne Hough’s debut, Luke Bryan’s debut, Toby Keith’s 35 Greatest Hits, and whatever CD ends up having Jo Dee Messina’s new song on it.) (Oh also, some new singer has an absolutely BEAUTIFUL new song out… a daddy/daughter song. It always makes me cry though, because the dad dies at the end.) But we’ll change gears now. BUT TELL ME IF ANY OF YOU LIKE ANY OF THOSE SONGS!! I mean not like you hafta listen to them, but if you do then I am interested in your opinions.

     

    So, friendlies, I’ve began studying Donald Maass’ book Writing the Breakout Novel. Like seriously. I have pages of notes and I’m only on the, uh, fouth chapter? Fourth chapter. And fourteen pages of notes. I mean, they’re short pages, but still.

     

    That was what I did today while work was dead. Work seems to always be dead. Dead, dead, dead. Haha sorry. Anyways, want pictorial evidence of my studiousness? (I told my parents I was studying and they probably figured I was studying for a final. But no! No, I was studying for fun. Wow. I must need therapy or something because honestly, who STUDIES FOR FUN?) (Or if they do, who takes notes and admits it?)

     

    What was I saying? Pictorial evidence? Okay here goes.

     

    There you have it. Notes. About premise. For a breakout novel. OH I AM SUCH AN EXCITING PERSON!!

     

    And do you know what I kept thinking of the entire time I was studying this book? (No, you don’t. So why don’t I just tell you?) HOUSE. Yep, the show. I was thinking of what a perfect story it was/is and how it has all the great elements. Specifically I was reading the chapter on stakes and thinking of the season finale and how the stakes just kept being raised. I was thinking that House is a really great and perfect-like example of a breakout novel.

     

    Even though, you know, not technically a novel. In fact, even if you stretch your imagination it’s still not a novel.

     

    In other news, I feel like doing another meme. Let me just find one. Okay, this one looks interesting. Go to this site to see it because it’s kinda hard to explain. (And no, I’m not kidding you, I actually got the band name Zulu Cannibal Giants. I know you’re all jealous.) (Also, I heartily recommend this meme. It’s good fun! Do it on your own blog and then post back here so I can see it!) (Also, apparently you get the same random quotes every time you click that link, but there’s a little ‘more random’ button on the bottom so can get a different one.)

     

    Anyways, THIS IS MY AWESOME CD COVER. FOR MY AWESOME BAND THAT IS, APPARENTLY, NAMED ZULU CANNIBAL GIANTS. Woot!

     

  • fun with a stolen meme

    So guess what?

     

     Thing Number Five:

     

    The Jordyn loves memes. And lo! Here is one now! Stolen from E. Lockhart’s blog, of course.

     

    What were you doing ten years ago?

     

    Well, I was eight years old. Which means I don’t actually have a journal dating back that far, but ten years ago I had just moved back to Arizona from our one-year stint in the FLAT FLAT FLAT land of Texas, and I was spending the beginning part of the summer traipsing freely in and out of my grandparents’ house and hanging out with the cuzzies.

     

    What are five things you need to do today?

     

    Today is almost over. Don’t you know that? Instead I’ll post five things I already did today. 1. I went to work. 2. I watched episodes of The Office. 3. I filled my gas tank up with what I can only assume was PURE SOLID GOLD. 4. I returned the movie we rented that I didn’t actually watch but Mom and Taylor the Lovely did, so it doesn’t really matter. 5. I took a shower.

     

    What are some snacks you enjoy?

     

    Cheese. Chocolate. Cream peas. (NO NOT KIDDING.) Edamame.

     

    What would you do if you were a billionaire?

     

    You mean with the money? Or just in general? In general I would probably travel, also buy a few houses if I had THAT MUCH money. (Which brings me to another point… how much is a billion really? And do I have one billion or many billions?) But other than that and buying more books/music my life wouldn’t change to much. I’m pretty sure the American Heart Association, the Children’s Heart Foundation, and Ronald McDonald House charities would get a large chunk of change. Isn’t it funny (not funny haha) that even in our charities we choose things that directly or semi-directly affect us?

     

    What are three bad habits?

     

    You’re being a bit too vague. Three of my bad habits or just three bad habits that anyone could have? I’m going with the more general here because, come on, the Jordyn doesn’t have any bad habits (STOP LAUGHING, YOU!). 1. Smoking. 2. Whining. 3. Constantly one-upping others.

     

    Name five places you have lived.

     

    Arizona in a trailer. Texas. Arizona in a house. THE NEIGHBORHOOD FULL OF CRIMINAL ACTIVITY LIKE PEOPLE STEALING OTHER PEOPLE’S CARS RIGHT OUT OF THEIR DRIVEWAYS in California. Another, less car-stealing neighborhood in California.

     

    What are five jobs you’ve had?

     

    Um, get back to me in a few years? Haha really, I’ve only got three. 1. Babysitter (my favorite!). 2. Fast food worker. 3. Handbag kiosk salesgirl.

     

    So. That’s it. TTFN (as Tigger says), friendlies!

  • today, i...

    What I Did Today:

     

    • Went to work.
    • Came home from work incredibly early because of the rain and the fact of everything being outside.
    • Went to Albie’s and purchased some foodstuffs.
    • Made pizza. FROM SCRATCH!
    • Watched Friends.
    • Kept on reading Accepted.
    • Worked on my novel, which is going along quite slowly thankyouverymuch.
    • Texted my friend to see how she was doing.
    • Fell asleep reading Accepted, which is no reflection of the book it’s just that it was really gloomy today and I haven’t been feeling great anyways.
    • Woke up to ten thousand (okay, I’m exaggerating) texts and calls from my parents because neither me nor Taylor were answering the phones.
    • Called them both back and proceeded to begin watching some movie on tv.
    • Cleaned the kitchen.
    • Went to the movie place to rent National Treasure 2 only to find out that it was closed (not even 10pm on a Saturday night…), so I…
    • went to Albie’s and found the Redbox movie rental thing and rented PS I Love You because they didn’t have National Treasure.

     

    Wow. It really appears that I did nothing today.

  • three letter identifiers

    Ever since I went to New York for the Red readings in November I’ve wanted to travel.

     

    Which is mildly odd because I never wanted to travel before. I mean not that I had anything against it, just that I was fine not. And now I think it was probably because I was so happy where I was, whereas I’m not as happy where I am now. And I think of the people I know, the people my age for whom travel is a big aspiration (or a big reality) in their lives and I think they all have one thing in common: none of them want to stay where they are.

     

    One girl, ever since I’ve known her (which is to say since we were five), has wanted to get out of our hometown. She’s always known she wanted something bigger, something not so isolated, not so far from the rest of civilization.

     

    Another (who I actually met in New York) has a similar feeling about the place she lives.

     

    Yet another just wants to get away from drama in her real life.

     

    And me?

     

    Well I never wanted to flee my hometown and even now that I live in a place I’m not so fond of I don’t hate it. I want to get out, yes, but not right now; right now I just want to enjoy the summer and get through school and figure out where it is that I want to wind up permanently. When it comes to me and travel, I think I’m a little like Rory Gilmore though it took me a while to figure it out. I adore my hometown and have never thought I was “too good” for it, but every subsequent place I go seems fascinating. Even here. Every place has its own culture, its own identity and pulse, its own LIFE. And every place I go just opens my mind up a little more. It’s like this quote from the Newberry Winner, Criss Cross:

     

    “I think,” he said, “that it’s a good thing to get out of you usual, you know, surroundings. Because you find things out about yourself that you didn’t know, or you forgot. And then you go back to your regular life and you’re changed, you’re a little bit different because you take those new things with you.”

     

    This rings true for me. It seems that wherever I go I find new things about myself.

     

    In New York I found out that I could navigate subways and that they didn’t give me panic attacks (I had thought they would). I found out that, just as I had assumed, I was more interested in people watching at Starbucks than seeing the Empire State Building or the Statue of Liberty, that for the first time ever I began thinking that maybe I - small-town Jordyn - could feel at home in a big city.

     

    In Northern California I found out that yes, crossing the bridges did scare me a little (the possibility of earthquakes, you know), but that I loved the climate. I found that the town my friend lives in, with its village architecture, felt like home. I found that there were two-story Borders and cute little bookshops and that my dad’s prediction of me loving it, was spot-on. I found that being away from my parents for a weekend made them more worried than it made me and that boarding planes and sitting alone and navigating SFO airport didn’t scare me so much as it made me smile and think that maybe I would be better at this growing up thing than I give myself credit for.

     

    Florida, when I visited the summer before sixth grade, and a few times since then, showed me a different side of my mom. It made me realize, probably for the first time, that she had a life before my dad and me and my sister, that she had a whole family, siblings and everything, apart from us. It taught me that I am not partial to the humidity and that thunderstorms every afternoon wouldn’t sit well with me. And, of course, it introduced me to one of my best friends.

     

    Sometimes the best way to find yourself is to get lost, to be somewhere unknown, to let go of your everyday.

     

    You know how I think everyone lives in their own little bubble? Well the thing about travel, and probably why I love it so much and want to do more of it in the future, is that it widens that bubble. It shows us things about ourselves that we never knew, it changes us in little ways, and it makes us appreciate other ways of living. People can do this for us also, but that is a story for another time.

News

Oct. 15 [going to work soon] [two school essays due; majorly nervous about both] [remember when i wrote that short story where the girl said "majorly" every other WORD practically? ha]