February 2009 - Posts

  • Alarm clock, my fish.

     So I was reading jordynt's blog post about hating microwave beeps, and it got me thinking of a rather strange affliction I have with my alarm clock. Now, your probably thinking, "Well, lots of people hate their alarm clock."


    But I have yet to meet another person who can't let their alarm beep more than twice for fear that the world will explode.


    Haha! Gotcha on that one, huh? But yes. My alarm clock (pictured below) makes THE most GOD-AWFUL beeping noise EVER. It is not the really annoying, repetative, shreiking beeps, that are common with many bedside clocks. But this, I don't really know how to explain it. It is like a slow, short, spine-tingling, skull shivering beeping.


    It makes me want to hurt people. Just a little. Like throw this clock at your head to shut if off, hurt. You'll probably survive, I have really bad aim.


    But as I was saying, this beeping is so horrible that it has penetrated every fiber of my consious. which is very low in the morning, as you can imagine. I have been using this clock for, 4 years? Christmas present (thanks a lot, parents). It is understandable that waking up at 6 am every morning on the edge of a dream can mess with your psyche, right?


    Sometimes I will be so disoriented that I will a.) forget how to turn it off, or b.) completely forget where I am and have a quick panic attack on what that excruciating sound actually is.


    Regardless of how dazed and confused I am when it goes off, I ABSOLUTELY must stop the beeping before it reaches its third beep. You see, I am not like your average teenager when it comes to waking up. When my alarm clock goes off, I rush out of bed and down the 2nd floor stairs to get ready, immediately. This is because the beeping is so peircing that for the 11 seconds it takes me to get out of bed, down the stairs, and into the bathroom, I am fully awake. Then once the initial shock of the alarm is over, I am much like the common, sluggish, cranky teenagers you are used to. So, because the beeping is such a psychological assault, and after having this clock in the same place for 4 years, my reflexes toward the 'off' button are so sharp and defined that it is by pure training that as of yet, it is has not been allowed to ring more than twice. This notion got me thinking about what would actually happen if it did reach its third ring, thus beginning the whole "the world will explode", complex, because, really, if it has never happened, how do you know what would happen if such an event took place? You wouldn't!


    (It is the increasingly-not-so-rare times like this that I let the crazy take over).


    <img src="http://www.gosale.com/product_images/314000/314061-oregon-scientific-rm313pa-b.jpg">



    This happened 2 days ago, and I don't think I have been this angry in a long time.


    I have mentioned my beta fish, Tampon, to you guys, right? Well he lives in a fishbowl, so every few weeks I have to change the water from his filth. Well, it was getting around that time to do it. I walked into my room 2 nights ago, and I see the water level in my fishbowl significantly raised from its previous amount. I knew right away who dumped water in Tampon's bowl, so I confronted her. I said "mother, did you put water in my fishbowl?" and she replies, "yes, you were killing your fish."


    Then I pretty much just snapped.


    Betafish dont usually live that long, but if you are a good owner, you can keep them alive for a couple years, which is what I have done. Tampon has been alive for almost a year a half. I feed him every night, I change his water, I bought him with my money, I have kept him alive for this long. He is mine. So when someone, who doesn't even know his name or how to take care of him, walks into my room, puts water is my fishbowl and then accuses me of being a bad owner and almost killing him? She has absolutely no right to my fish. It is not her responsibilty to make sure I dont kill him. SHE HAD NO RIGHT.


    So I tell her never to touch my fish again. And she just keeps at it. OMIGOD IT MADE ME CRAZY.


    She doesn't know how to care of him! You can't just dump water from the bathroom sink into his bowl! You have to use filtered water, and you have to let it sit for at least 6 hours, so the water can adjust to room temperature. If you dump in water that is too warm or too cold, your fish could go into shock and DIE. She doesn't know this because she has never payed attention to him before. Just on a whim, I don't know why she did it, she peeks in my room to check on him (wtf?) and decides he needs more water. YOU DONT EVEN KNOW!


    Tampon didn't die from her spur of the moment PETA act, but, man, I couldn't believe her. She doesn't know anything about my fish. Don't touch him.

  • Swim meet scandal

    Yesterday there was a swim meet at our school and Sarah's boyfriend, Colton, is on the team so she always attends the home meets. Sarah was pestering me to come and trying to goad me with "there will be super hot guys with abs wearing speedos," but I really did not want to go, because they are kinda really boring. But, my mother of course wasn't having any of that and she wanted to have some valentine's day "alone time" with our father, so I agreed to go along.


    lol, on the way out of the house, I say to my father, "You two better have lots and lots of sex while we're gone or I'm going to be mad," then he says, "What are you talking about? We're not having sex!" and then my mother is like, "Lee! I want to get them out of the house!". lol, so yea, we left.


    I bought a 50/50 raffle ticket, didn't win the $49 prize. O well. Our team lost, go figure.


    So then Sarah and I get home and BOY! Do our parents have a sense of humor! Even though they didn't have sex, we walked into the living room and found meticulously placed clothing items as if they were strewn in the frenzy of love making; such as underwear on the table lamp, a bra on the tv, socks hanging from the curtain poles, and pants, well, you get the picture.




    Are you ready for the next exciting edition of the World Civ Chronicles?


    Well, this isn't that funny, more like really pathetic.

    We took a chapter test today. But, the last test we took, the girl next to me I'm betting was counting on copying my entire test, because I did see her catch my first answer so I was sure to cover my answers extra carefully. Then after I did that she sort of just sat there for a few minutes, unable to do anything because she couldnt see my answers (someone didn't study, perhaps?) But then in going back over my answers I actually realized I put a wrong answer for the first question, so I changed it but she didn't and got it wrong, lol. It was totally unintentional, though. That test was the first one we took of the new semester, which explained the new seats and the cheater sitting next to me.


    BUT anyways. For the test we took today, my teacher came right up in front of my desk and the girl next to me and announced to the class that there are open desks in the back so if we wanted to move we could, to not be so crowded, and he sort of motioned to the two of us. So after a few seconds of no one moving I got up and started to move and then the girl next to me made a little scoffing noise like "can you believe this girl? Doesn't trust me?" Damn right beotch.


    So yea, test went good, aced it, on to the American Revolution!

  • What if I killed someone?

     This month my school started this new policy that they are trying.


    Every Wednesday, instead of school starting at 7:20am, all students will arrive at school an hour later, 8:20, and every class will have 10 minutes taken off, so we still leave school at 2:15. The purpose of this is so teachers can spend one hour every week meeting with each other and organizing their stuff/curriculum/drinking coffee and talking about stupid things their students say.


    Now, my first 3 classes are not at my high school, but a different building where students from the 3 public high schools come and they have classes for specialization, such as web design, GIS, health science, hospitality, dental assistant, etc.


    SO... because not all 3 of the high schools are doing this new policy, the kids who attend still must arrive at 7:20, however we get an hour in the middle of the day after 3rd hour because everyone else is just starting 3rd hour when we finish.


    So far I have not disliked this policy, only because now I get to go out to lunch with some of my friends and relax. Today we went to Bob Evans (so not my choice).


    But anyways, today in World Civilization (the class with all the ignorant people), we were talking about England's government in the 1600s and when they introduced Habeas Corpus. In trying to explain Habeas Corpus to the class accurately, my teacher was unaware that he would be bombarded with such questions as being arrested for drugs and killing people for close to 20 minutes. Someone should have warned him.


    AND I KID YOU NOT - At one point he actually looked to me with a sort of pleading expression on his face.


    For some reason the class just could not grasp the concept. And what they didn't get was that everyone, no matter the circumstances, has the right to habeas corpus. So the questions they were asking him were ALL "what ifs".

    "What if I killed someone in front of a police officer?"

    - You have habeas corpus

    "What if I smoked crack on tv?"

    - You have habeas corpus

    "What if I don't get habeas corpus?"

    - Then you are free to leave after a certain period of time if you have not been brought before a judge.

    "Even if I killed somone in front of a police officer?"

    - Yes, because of habeas corpus.

    "I don't get it. You can just leave?"


    ...and it just went on forever. Geez people, go watch Law and Order.




    Last night I made cookies for my 5th hour French class. I messed up making them the first time because I added too much sugar, but they turned out well the second time. They were a big hit, thankfully. I wasn't able to taste the cookies before I gave them out because I wanted to make sure I had enough for everyone, and If I ate one I thought someone would be left out. But, even though I gave one to a non-5th-hour-french-friend, and one kid in my class took 2 cookies, I had enough where even I could eat one. They were ok tasting, but everyone said they really liked them, so I'm happy. Im the kind of person that doesn't like fresh-baked-"right out of the oven" cookies. I like cookies that have been sitting for 2 days and then you pop them in the microwave for 13-and-a-half seconds.

  • I invented writing. Really.

    Texting between Sarah and I; my message is first:


    "I just started reading Catcher in the Rye and I love how Pencey Prep is the name of the first band Frank Iero was in." 

    "ahaha I bet that is where he got it"

    "Yes, it is. Which is why I mentioned it."

    "Naa I mentioned it. My idea."

    "I looked it up on the www before I even texted you"

    "I wrote Catcher in the Rye. I know"

    "I invented writing."

    "I created the universe"

    "Ya know that whole 'big bang' theory? Well you see, it all started when I sneezed."

    "Yea but who wur daddy? I yur daddy."

    "Bitch, I yur daddys daddy"

    "Well its my hat, I am #1"

    "Everything tastes better with rabies"


    We're so funny. :P


  • Go get some fiends!

     My brother and I got into a little 'tiff today carried out through texting. A "texting-tiff", if you will.


    We went back and forth for a few texts, and finally he spouts this little beauty:

    "oh and get some friends"

    Now, Sarah and I are both very familiar with this comment, because it is the ONLY comeback he has, which he has been using for close to 2 years. It has never been a good comeback, considering Sarah and I both have a considerable amount of friends, more than he, actually.


    But the funniest thing was that in his text, while he meant to say "friends" he wrote "fiends". So he thinks I should go get some fiends. Obviously, I doubled over with laughter, along with Sarah after I showed it to her. In a way, he is right, I have plenty of friends, but I have a serious lack of fiends. Thanks for the advice, bro.



  • stupid quotes from World Civ.

    My World Civilization class is filled with the most ignorant people I have ever met.


    The first few days of school I tried to write down every stupid thing someone said, but eventually I stopped because I just couldn't keep up. But I will list a few of them for your entertainment:




    "'Kush' is like the name given to a plant, right? Uh, how do you spell it?" - (the word was in big letters, on the chalkboard.)


    "With 'Muslim' the 'ism' is like backwards, in the middle!" Then my teacher says, "Um, no, it's not. Its just 'Muslim'. Think about it in your head, get back to me."


    "My shoulder's dislocated!!!"


    "Mister, are you a Pilgrim?"



    "Sir, is the Rhinocerus a dinosaur?"




    Alright, today at school I decided to start recording these things again for you guys. Just today, I picked up thse beauties:

    "Are people from Greenland called 'greenspeople'?"


    "I heard Australia is like the safest place to live" - Actually, it has more deadly animals than any other country in the world. Good job with the research.


    "Doesn't Australia have that one animal from Bugs Bunny that starts with a 'T'?"


    (My teacher used to be in the army, and every once in awhile he will mention something about it, like today)

    So this one person asks him: "So you said you fought against freedom?"


    And this one was my favorite...

    "What? There is oil in Iraq?!"




  • My '25 Things'

    1. I have had an exorbant amount of grey hairs since I was about 9. One time I was having lunch at this coney island and the waitress says to me "Oh my gosh, I don't know how to tell you this, but you have a ton of grey hairs" and I was just like "Uh, yea, I know. Thanks". :P


    2. Sometimes I feel my life is so boring that I would rather stay in bed and dream all day.


    3. When I watch hockey games I start daydreaming that I am the worlds greatest hockey goalie and I am the first woman to be signed to the NHL. GO Wings! lol xD

    4. The last time I ate a hotdog I was about 3 or 4 and I ralfed it up everywhere.

    5. I have many secrets (yes, even ones you don't know, Sarah) *dun dun duuuun*

    6. Sometimes I will be thinking about random things, and all of a sudden I will become paranoid that someone is reading my mind. Then I start to think about how weird it is that the person reading my mind is hearing me think about how I think someone is reading my mind and then I start thinking about how the person who is reading my mind is hearing me think about how they are reading my mind and I am thinking that they are reading my mind. Or something. It is an endless cycle; a downward spiral into oblivion.

    7. Sarah and I like to play a game where she or I say a quote from a movie/tv show and then the other has to guess the movie/show. I almost always know the answer except when she says stupid quotes like from commercials I haven't seen or she doesn't say it right.

    8. I like companionable silences. I don't like being forced to think of something to say just for your comfort, so if I have nothing to say, I wont say anything, and I dont expect you to either. I can tell when you are uncomfortable and are fishing for conversation points, but it rather annoys me when you ask. Then when you really cant think of anything to say and I notice how unconfortable you are, I start to laugh, which, convieniently, gives you something to talk about, ie. "What's so funny?".

    9. When I hug people I usually inhale, which happens to give me a whiff of your body scent. Some people are like, "Did you just smell me?" Yes, I did. Got a problem with that?

    10. I can't think of enough things to put into this right now, so ill come back to it tomorrow.

    11. I was bitten by one of my old dogs when I was a year old and I have these horrible white scars on my upper lip and to the right of my chin. Most people don't notice them, but sometimes they bother me. :\

    12. One time, Sarah and I were being stupid and driving around in a golf cart when we decided to go really fast and drive standing up over these little hills. Sarah made a sharp turn and I flew out of the golf cart, breaking my left wrist. However, to not get into even more trouble we told everyone that we were just driving and Sarah made a sharp turn and I fell out. Don't tell my parents. lol!

    13. I have a Beta fish that I named Tampon. No, he isn't red.

    14. Whenever I go to the movies, I always fold and rip my ticket into the smallest possible rectangles/squares I can - all of equal sizes. Then, I drop them on the floor and wonder about what the people who clean the floors say when they see a rather large pile of tiny, equal sized ticket rippings. I imagine that everytime they find this pile they say "We got another one!" and all the movie theaters in the area that I have "hit" have a hotline they call to report this event and there is a Wanted Poster of me somewhere in the storage rooms.

    15. The two things I hate the most are gremlins and getting papercuts.


    16. I wish I could draw - well.


    17. Whenever I wear a long-sleeved t-shirt, I push my sleeves up to my elbows, even if it is really cold outside. I also don't wear rings or bracelets - ever. I hate having things like that 'in the way'.


    18. I prefer silver over gold. I love necklaces because they are the only jewelry I wear, and all of them are silver. For this past Christmas, I asked my father for a silver MSU 'Sparty' helmet necklace, and one time I went on his computer to print something out and found an auction he was bidding on of a /gold/ MSU necklace and I told him as nicely as I could that I don't like gold and he got really mad at me and threatened to get me nothing for christmas. However, my mother talked some sense into him because she knew for a fact that I don't like gold.


    19. My favorite color is brown. Not poop brown, but dark, dark brown. Like "interior decorating brown"


    20. I used to love winter because I love skiing, but it has pretty much ruined my life, as of late. Now, I love summer. :)


    21. I prefer brunette boys to blond ones any day of the week. If you stand 2 identical guys next to each other, one with blond hair and the other brown, you can guess which one I would choose. yummy.


    22. I wish I was skinny like Sarah. THERE, OK!? I SAID IT.


    23. My favorite part of the day used to be the early morning, during spring, while on the bus ride to school I could watch the painted sunrise. In the winter, however, it is still shit dark.


    24. I am glad I am finally at #24 because it has taken me 4 days to think of 25 things to write about myself. At least, things I could say.


    25. I say "I love you" more than anyone I know. I also call almost all of my friends "Lover". However, I really, really do mean it. And while a few of them think its weird, and only a handful say it back, I still say it because I want them to understood how much they mean to me.

  • DDID - Don't Do Illegal Drugs.

    Ahh! Finally back and writing! I sort of forgot my login info which is why I haven't blogged in forever and a day, heheh! /end stupid.


    A LOT has been happening lately. Um, I got a job? That isn't really news since I have been working for, let's see, 8 months? It's a pretty sweet set up, really. I work for my city at City Hall, in the GIS/MIS Department. It's all computer stuff, some data entry but mostly working with GIS technology called ArcMap, as well as a small amount of web design. :D

    Oh! Sarah and I got into Michigan State University! I am suuuuper excited. Our parents are very iffy on the subject though, because we did apply and get accepted into a few community colleges which we could go to for practically free, and I got an $8,000 scholarship to one of them. We just don't have the money to pay for both of us going to MSU without putting ourselves in some major dept for years to come.

    A small ray of hope, perhaps? I have devised a plan that hopefully will be picked up and take off. I don't want to reveal too much until I get the ball rolling, but all you REDs will be playing a large part in it, so be ready. :)

    And I guess I should vent on the brother front? Well he did indeed graduate from high school. It was close though, he walked, but he had to go to summer school to get his diploma. He was arrested for I think drunk driving? Or it could have been drugs...yea, I'm pretty sure it was drugs. He was picked up and taken home by police because of drunk driving, though. THE GOOD NEWS! He moved to Florida! Sarah and I have been soooo happy now that he is out of our hair. Oh, but some more bad news, and this actually happened today, this morning: He was arrested again! This time for possession of marijuana, apparently. Heheh, he just won't ever learn, will he? It's not a hard concept: Don't Do Illegal Drugs - DDID, for short. We should make t-shirts! Coffee mugs! Frisbees! We can drive around at night and throw them to all the crackheads in Detroit! As long as we're driving a fast car, bullet-proof, preferably.

    Congrats President Obama! :D (I couldn't vote *sniff*)

    I heard on the radio a few days ago that he passed a new tax on cigarettes that will go towards children's health care. That really made my day, he is so great. I hope my brother enjoys the new tax. (Haha! Suckaaaa) :P